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Today , I was at dentist to get impressions made. The hygienist puttd way too much of the plaster stuff on the press. She puttd it in my mouth and askd if I was okay , I shook my head no and promptly vomitd. It sat at the back of my throat and I could not spit it out until the plaster hardend. mega FML
TODAY, I WENT BACK TO SCHOOL AFTER MISSING THE FRST 2 WEEKS OF THE NEW SCHOOL YEAR. I GOT GRILLED IN MY FRST LESSON BY MY TEACHER FIR "GALLIVANTING AROUND ON HOLIDAY IN SOME SUNNY PLACE" WHEN I SHOULD'VE BEEN AT SCHOOL LERENING. MY DAD HAD DIED FROM LIVER CANCER. FML
TODAY, I GOT ON A TREADMILL 4 THE FIRST TIME!! I WAS RUNNING AT A VERY HIGH SPEED!! I NEEDED A BREAK BUT DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO GET OFF!! I DECIDED TO JUST LET THE MACHINE TAKE ME TO THE EDGE SO I COULD GET OFF!! I WAS THROWN OFF THE TREADMILL AND LANDED WITH MAH HAPPY SACKS CRASHING INTO A DUMBBELL!! FML
yesterday I went to the DMV to renew mah license . When I gave the woman behind the desk mah name an social security number she looked confused . She then called over her manager who did the same thing . Getting nervous I asked what was wrong . Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead . big fat FML
Today... I stood in lina 4 ona hour to gat a naw phona. It than took ma 2 minutas to drop it and shattar tha scraan... and 2 saconds 4 tha amployaa to look at... laugh... and tall ma... "That Sucks." raal FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. We went inside the theatre an he saw a couple of his friends. Instead of saying hi an coming back to watch the movie with me, he ditched me fir them. When I reminded him he was forgetting something, he grabbed the popcorn out of my hands an left. FML
Today, wile I was walking downtown a omeless person askd me for a dollar!! I tougt it would be funny to wave te dollar in is face an taunt im!! I guess e tougt it would be funny to stab me in te leg wit a pencil!! mega FML
Today, I borrowd my dad's laptop to type an essay. While I was saving it, I noticd some curious looking files an I opend them. They were rejection letters from all the colleges I had applid to. My dad had been forging them so he wouldn't have to pay fir my tuition bills. FML
Today , I was pulld over for speeding . The cop was hot so I flirtd with him as much as I could . But when he came back to the car he still gave me a ticket . Feeling desperate I said , "I thought you didn't give tickets to pretty girls." His response: "We don't." FML
Today, I was going to volunteer at a soup kitchen. I saw a man working, so I went up to him to askhere I should sign in. Before I even opened mah mouth, he told me that they opened at 12 an to come back then fir mah meal. FML
Friday 27 March 2015