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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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jesseheath

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jesseheath
  • Town/Country : Birmingham, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 February 1986 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 16552
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jesseheath : I ride bikes. I enjoy life.

www.myspace.com/jessefkinheath
http://jesseheath672.blogspot.com/
http://twitter.com/jesseheath

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jesseheath's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for awhile, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792 (843)

I agree, your life sucks (228734) - you deserved it (19504)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

#818828 (280)

I agree, your life sucks (53021) - you deserved it (11887)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend and he brushed my hair out of my eyes. Then he smiled and said "Your eyes are two different colors right now. One's blue, one's green..." I was so happy he still noticed the little things. Then he finished his sentence with "...ya know, like a dog." FML

#780789 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (46761) - you deserved it (3813)

On 04/03/2009 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909 (375)

I agree, your life sucks (138247) - you deserved it (18735)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (363080) - you deserved it (401427)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)