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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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jellyghost's favorite FMLs
Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he was thinking about us taking a break. After an hour of crying and him saying it would be okay, I accepted it. When I asked when the break would start, he replied, "What are you talking about? I only said I'd thought about it" and then laughed. FML
by Gullible / 02/25/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, while I was babysitting, the little girl wanted to show me a picture that her mom had just sent to the family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be helpful, I clicked iMessage, only to see pictures of her father's erect penis. She won't stop asking about the "hotdog" in the picture. FML
by Scarlett / 02/16/2013 at 1:03am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by uhoh / 02/16/2013 at 12:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML
by assoutofuandme / 02/14/2013 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Transportation
by notgay / 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by excusemeprincess / 02/11/2013 at 12:08pm / United States (New York) / Love
by Angry Mob / 02/01/2013 at 1:09am / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals
Today, I had to have major oral surgery. Needless to say I am in need of some heavy pain medication. My pharmacist insists that my surgeon never called in my medicine, and my surgeon insists otherwise. This has been going back and forth for hours. FML
by Anonymous / 01/28/2013 at 4:18pm / United States (Alabama) / Health
by weddingsalwayssuck / 01/28/2013 at 4:01pm / United States (New York) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/26/2013 at 5:20pm / Denmark (Syddanmark) / Love
by walkingdictionary / 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by jakeeey / 01/17/2013 at 8:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML
by Anonymous / 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by What a happy day / 01/14/2013 at 12:36pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
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- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…
- Today, I found out what a lightweight my girlfriend is. After having a couple of drinks, she began… Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut… Today, my daughter fell asleep early, so my husband and I decided to get frisky. He passed out mid…