jellybean17

Search for a member

jellybean17

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 August 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14069
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

jellybean17's page activity

Visits<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 12:58pm<b>Rais</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 1:18am<b>vincentjules</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 8:33am<b>QueenBii</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 12:39am<b>tiger820</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 10:28pm<b>holymacabre</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:46am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 4:54pm<b>nemoking797</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:48pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:37pm<b>nateh763</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:03pm<b>Zyssii</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:57am<b>bps315</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 2:51pm<b>rememberthefood</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 12:29am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 8:44pm<b>PITSB</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 1:24am<b>DarkAngel34</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 11:57pm<b>pimpcess_yanna</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 11:19am<b>03stroker03</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:39am

Fucked!<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 6:58pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 4:28am<b>PITSB</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 7:25am<b>pimpcess_yanna</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 5:19pm

jellybean17's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jellybean17's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breaths on my neck. When I was about to finish he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck/ear and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

by bodyelectric / 04/13/2009 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my two year old cousin was having a temper tantrum. I decided to give him a flashlight because playing with it usually distracts him. It didn't. Instead, he hit me in the face with it as hard as possible, leaving a bruise. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2009 at 10:39pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML

by anon13 / 04/12/2009 at 12:27am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

by ripped / 04/11/2009 at 2:10am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

by ripped / 04/11/2009 at 2:10am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he's my cousin: priceless. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 2:42pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was riding on a stationary exercise bike at home, when I went to get off, my shorts got stuck under the seat. I dangled half upside down until my shorts ripped and I fell on the ground face first breaking my front tooth. I broke my tooth riding a bike that doesn’t even move. FML

by missy / 04/10/2009 at 4:17am / Italy (Toscana) / Health

Today, I came home expecting a surprise party. It was my birthday and I had overheard my friends planning it all week. Nobody was there. It turns out the party they were planning was for my friend's dog's birthday. FML

by sheryl_m / 04/09/2009 at 11:11am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the orthodontist. As the lady was clipping my brackets, she missed and clipped my gums instead. She looked at me and said, "Oh sorry, you're bleeding really badly. See, I got these fake nails put on and I guess I'm just not used to them. Let me try again." She missed. FML

by BracesSuck / 04/09/2009 at 8:33am / United States (Missouri) / Health

Today, I was out shopping for bras. While in one store, I couldn't seem to find any in my size. When I asked an employee for help, they took one look at my chest and said "Mabye you should try our girls section, we have a lot of training bras." I'm 25. FML

by blahhhh / 04/09/2009 at 6:47am / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

by BadBreath / 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

by nothing / 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids