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jellybean17

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jellybean17

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 August 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12983
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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jellybean17's page activity

Visits<b>choslayer</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:22am<b>J3wl3acca</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 3:45am<b>smalltownman</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 10:56am<b>lisaint</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:13pm<b>bigboi1992</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 5:08am<b>purecountry119</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 1:27pm<b>beerlaoisawesome</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 9:14am<b>baekedlays</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 7:34pm<b>avertree</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 5:46pm<b>ToxicSilence</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 10:08pm<b>Jaycee1579</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 11:08am<b>ironpanda</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 9:35am<b>alex1010</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 3:59pm<b>dieselguy</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 6:48am<b>PUCKSTOPPER1976</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 5:25am<b>bluepandas</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 5:41pm<b>kittiesrock</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 11:09pm<b>meep202</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 6:34pm

jellybean17's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jellybean17's favorite FMLs

Today, my two year old cousin was having a temper tantrum. I decided to give him a flashlight because playing with it usually distracts him. It didn't. Instead, he hit me in the face with it as hard as possible, leaving a bruise. FML

#940357
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36606) - you deserved it (23135)

On 04/12/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML

#921004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18339) - you deserved it (88098)

On 04/12/2009 at 12:27am - intimacy - by anon13 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

#910687
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31106) - you deserved it (58681)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by ripped (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

#910687
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31106) - you deserved it (58681)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by ripped (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

#909616
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67316) - you deserved it (19880)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he's my cousin: priceless. FML

Today, I was riding on a stationary exercise bike at home, when I went to get off, my shorts got stuck under the seat. I dangled half upside down until my shorts ripped and I fell on the ground face first breaking my front tooth. I broke my tooth riding a bike that doesn’t even move. FML

#897879
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55605) - you deserved it (8779)

On 04/10/2009 at 4:17am - misc - by missy (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, I came home expecting a surprise party. It was my birthday and I had overheard my friends planning it all week. Nobody was there. It turns out the party they were planning was for my friend's dog's birthday. FML

#884273
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61581) - you deserved it (4014)

On 04/09/2009 at 11:11am - misc - by sheryl_m (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the orthodontist. As the lady was clipping my brackets, she missed and clipped my gums instead. She looked at me and said, "Oh sorry, you're bleeding really badly. See, I got these fake nails put on and I guess I'm just not used to them. Let me try again." She missed. FML

#883158
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75666) - you deserved it (2714)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:33am - misc - by BracesSuck (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was out shopping for bras. While in one store, I couldn't seem to find any in my size. When I asked an employee for help, they took one look at my chest and said "Mabye you should try our girls section, we have a lot of training bras." I'm 25. FML

#882840
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52302) - you deserved it (4409)

On 04/09/2009 at 6:47am - misc - by blahhhh (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38487) - you deserved it (129203)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

#879478
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65154) - you deserved it (8522)

On 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm - animals - by BadBreath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

#877965
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65302) - you deserved it (10929)

On 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by eun (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

#873760
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24975) - you deserved it (59332)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm - kids - by nothing (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I realized that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML

#873540
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15272) - you deserved it (74494)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:34pm - misc - by UGH (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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