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jellybean17

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jellybean17
  • Town/Country : Athens, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 August 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 12804
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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jellybean17's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

#4958000
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82736) - you deserved it (4853)

On 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm - kids - by beya (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a stressful day at work and decided to go in the jacuzzi. I hadn't used it for a year, so it was a little dirty. After I cleaned it, filled it up, and jumped in, I pressed the jets. Immediately, thousands of dead moths shot out at full speed towards me. FML

#4927406
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49777) - you deserved it (12919)

On 08/30/2009 at 11:23am - misc - by mel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60653) - you deserved it (15379)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, at work, I was putting away clothes in the Men's department, when a guy came and started shopping in the aisle in front of me. He kept staring at me non-stop. Getting fed up, I said "What are you staring at?" Turns out he was wearing his sunglasses on the back of his head. FML

#4865635
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5716) - you deserved it (45821)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:00pm - work - by staringisrude (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I spotted my neighbour's cat sitting on their front garden. I bent over and began walking towards it with my hand out saying, "Hello pussycat". I was only a few feet away when I realised I was talking to a white bag of sand. I turned to see my family in hysterics. FML

#4806587
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10587) - you deserved it (33811)

On 08/25/2009 at 7:40am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

#4674126
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17383) - you deserved it (43664)

On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML

#3205233
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58552) - you deserved it (3453)

On 06/25/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by Emptyspace (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML

#3176908
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44752) - you deserved it (26648)

On 06/24/2009 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by BadBribe (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my friend decided to come clean to his parents about his pot usage. He told them that he did it with me on many occasions. His parents decided it would be the right thing to call my parents. Thanks a lot asshole. FML

#3165947
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23230) - you deserved it (46939)

On 06/24/2009 at 2:44am - misc - by jerk (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting next to this cute guy on an airplane who I had started talking to. There was still an empty seat between us and it seemed like there weren't any more passengers boarding the plane. I then asked out loud, "I wonder if anyone will sit between us?" He replied "I hope so." FML

#3163713
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39559) - you deserved it (10409)

On 06/24/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by Nutty (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on, and listening to loud music when she suddenly looked worried and asked if I heard something. I said no and continued. Moments later, three firemen opened the bedroom door and told us to get dressed and go outside because the building was on fire. FML

#3155973
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45072) - you deserved it (8662)

On 06/23/2009 at 8:56pm - love - by Jerf (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my car was impounded because I never registered it in California after moving here. In order to get it back, I need to register it. In order to register it, I need to pass a CA smog check. In order to pass the smog check, I need my car. FML

#3153262
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49540) - you deserved it (12267)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by nicklesg (woman) - United States (California)



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