About jellyD : Observer, audience and participant of life and its' antics.
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Today, I slammed the car door on my head while I was getting in the car. If that wasn't bad enough, my boyfriend is convinced I now have a concussion and insists on waking me up every hour to make sure I'm still alive. FML
by MAC. / 08/04/2012 at 5:33am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, I was at the mall, when I saw an elderly lady drop her groceries, so I rushed over to help her pick them up. She took one look at me, called me a "Liberal bastard," and shouted for me to get away from her before she called the cops. FML
by WTF is all I ask / 07/27/2012 at 7:55pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my fiancée's OCD hit a new low when she screamed at me for flicking the light-switch off "the wrong way". This led to her flicking it on and off about a dozen times, followed by a twenty-minute lecture on how to do it "properly". We're getting married next month. FML
by Anonymous / 07/27/2012 at 5:23pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Love
Today, I was fired for telling a customer's kid to shut his mouth. As revenge, I sent the CEO a picture I acquired months ago of my boss drunkenly pissing on a cow. He wrote that it was the funniest thing he had ever seen, and that I am "clearly an insufferable killjoy; a total liability to the company." FML
by Alexander D. / 07/13/2012 at 8:48pm / United States / Work
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- Today, I signed up on one of those "cheater" dating sites. I ended up meeting my own girlfriend. FML Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey… Today, I was hit with a sudden onset of diarrhea and had to use the washroom on the train. As soon…