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jazzyjazz23's favorite FMLs
Today, at work my boss called me into his office because he had received multiple complaints from coworkers about a prank sound machine I have been using to make inappropriate fart sounds at my desk. I wish it was a fart machine; I have a condition. FML
by Anonymous / 10/18/2012 at 2:33am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2012 at 8:36am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, a one-eyed drunken homeless man followed me around the store I work at, screaming at me because I turned down his sexual advances. My managers and coworkers wouldn't kick him out because they thought it was funny. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2012 at 12:48am / United States (Missouri) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
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- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the… Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,…