jaymers

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jaymers

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 22973
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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jaymers's page activity

Visits<b>paigexox0</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 5:51am<b>OneDayDown</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 10:22am<b>cadillacgal79</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 11:40am<b>Epic_Kassi</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 11:57am<b>Hypophrenia</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 2:14pm<b>lisajune</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 11:44am<b>APrincess11</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 6:50pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:38pm<b>bigmad50</b> - the 05/11/2009 at 7:01pm<b>krazzygood</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 10:58pm<b>Gretzkey20</b> - the 05/01/2009 at 6:49pm<b>cdklos</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 10:34pm<b>OperationNicole</b> - the 04/01/2009 at 12:11pm<b>maddog</b> - the 03/20/2009 at 5:00am<b>member0987654321</b> - the 03/14/2009 at 3:57pm<b>Smasher00zy</b> - the 03/04/2009 at 2:44pm

jaymers's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

jaymers's favorite FMLs

Today, me and my boyfriend came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good my phone rings. It was a text from my mom, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

by MrAwsum / 03/17/2009 at 4:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while; my dad said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML

by mugs / 03/12/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while; my dad said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML

by mugs / 03/12/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, it was my birthday. My girlfriend bought me a Nickelback CD. FML

by deez_nutz / 03/10/2009 at 8:46am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I went to my guidance counselor and told her how I'd been fascinated with space since I was 12, had read about the universe and everything, and how I want to be an astrologist when I grow up. She stared at me for a second, before saying, "But you're... stupid." FML

by astroloser / 03/07/2009 at 11:10am / Philippines (Rizal) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year old daughter from her room texts me, "Stop." FML

by dad / 03/03/2009 at 5:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

by joAnne / 03/03/2009 at 4:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids