Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jannahmetcalfe

Search for a member

jannahmetcalfe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 December 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 658
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jannahmetcalfe : Hey people-- ;p I'm Jannah and I love fml
I pole vault and did gymnastics for ten years
I love playing soccer and baseball casually
Pretty chill person so hmu sometime

Email: jannahmetcalfe2@gmail.com

jannahmetcalfe's page activity

Visits<b>w4rri0r</b> - the 08/13/2012 at 11:19am<b>0void0</b> - the 08/04/2012 at 2:08pm<b>AugustBurnsToast</b> - the 07/17/2012 at 4:54am<b>Marceline_17</b> - the 07/14/2012 at 7:29pm<b>muffinXmonster</b> - the 07/13/2012 at 12:24am

jannahmetcalfe's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of jannahmetcalfe's badges

jannahmetcalfe's favorite FMLs

Today, after me and my boyfriend had pretty much amazing sex, he took off the condom and started swinging it back and forth, all while making the sounds of a clock and saying, "You are getting sleepy." FML

#13363773
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27009) - you deserved it (6093)

On 10/08/2010 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML

#13145011
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50018) - you deserved it (3466)

On 09/21/2010 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

#12986098
383 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26972) - you deserved it (12187)

On 09/10/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Me - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML

#12948197
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26237) - you deserved it (22310)

On 09/07/2010 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML

#8565371
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24377) - you deserved it (6687)

On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

#7556761
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16613) - you deserved it (41673)

On 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Ben (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I learned that the four girls who I assumed were my girlfriends' good friends and whom she was always talking about were actually characters from the television show, "Sex and the City." My girlfriend has fictional friends. FML

#3980523
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48252) - you deserved it (5744)

On 07/23/2009 at 3:16pm - love - by tubedout (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: