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jamjelly386

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jamjelly386
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4311
  • Number of comments : 127
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jamjelly386's favorite FMLs

Today, I found pictures in my boyfriend's phone of our dog eating treats out of my mouth while I'm sleeping. FML

#18242868
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25847) - you deserved it (3194)

On 11/14/2011 at 12:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I have two black eyes. The first one I got from the girl whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at a party last night. The other one I got from my girlfriend when I explained the first one. FML

#18240312
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12792) - you deserved it (21725)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:11pm - misc - by ThatHurts (man) - Canada

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13832) - you deserved it (49689)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, I was following my friend to her house in my car, because I didn't know where it was. I'd been following her for at least an hour when she pulled into a gas station. Turns out I'd been following the wrong car. I have no idea where I am. FML

#18225132
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25782) - you deserved it (9064)

On 11/12/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by friedchicken - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17004) - you deserved it (73804)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my young son wanted to rent some movie with talking animals in it for us to watch together. I couldn't say no, but talking animal movies freak me out big time, I either start to cry or feel nauseous. Especially ones with dogs. What is wrong with me? FML

#18217794
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23302) - you deserved it (7174)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:37am - animals - by Pk45 (man) - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, I dined and dashed. Upon reaching my car, I realized I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML

#18217676
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7036) - you deserved it (98311)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML

#18216431
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24589) - you deserved it (6828)

On 11/11/2011 at 3:42am - health - by devinchi (man) - United States

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

#18205995
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21018) - you deserved it (7585)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:15pm - health - by stinkypants - India

Today, my girlfriend and I had dinner at my boss's house. Just before we were ready to eat, my girlfriend came to me with a desperate look in her eyes. Apparently, she took a dump, clogged the toilet, and it flooded. I took the hit for her, and now my boss thinks I'm a jackass. FML

#18198987
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35132) - you deserved it (3811)

On 11/09/2011 at 12:59am - love - by kdeeeceee - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

#18190231
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39080) - you deserved it (7374)

On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had to endure yet another evening of the old man in the apartment above me screaming, "No, I don't want to shave my nose hair, you crazy bitch." He lives alone. FML

#18178318
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25523) - you deserved it (1824)

On 11/06/2011 at 8:23pm - misc - by hurtsmyears (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was attending my bachelor party. I watched a very attractive young girl dancing on a pole, giving me a seductive look. As she walked up to me, I realized it was my soon-to-be wife's younger sister. FML

#18170655
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24713) - you deserved it (15029)

On 11/06/2011 at 1:15am - misc - by wellthisisawkward80 - United States

Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML

#18150713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38897) - you deserved it (3512)

On 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm - work - by EunJung - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31181) - you deserved it (8636)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)



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