jaimielynne

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jaimielynne

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1502
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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jaimielynne's page activity

Visits<b>jonathanedwards</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 5:48pm<b>adb1827</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 4:19pm<b>cesarporto</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 12:31am<b>underscore23</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 6:30pm<b>HunterHimself</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 12:40pm<b>Alexeon</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 12:29pm<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 04/18/2013 at 1:25am<b>pyrokid4</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 2:33am<b>waffule365</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 5:15pm<b>Mister_Jl</b> - the 03/30/2013 at 11:58am<b>Skwurly87</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 1:06pm<b>clackity</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 1:00pm<b>motocross03</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 8:57am<b>mihaiesq</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 9:12am<b>kimberlycass</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 5:40am<b>nessaface25</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 4:26am<b>hadeschaos</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 2:49am<b>dead247</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 1:35am

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jaimielynne's favorite FMLs

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

by Nightmare / 01/15/2013 at 9:41am / Kids

Today, I met my girlfriend's family. Her mother wants us to stay in separate bedrooms, and I was happy to oblige since I'm staying at their house. But because there isn't an extra room, we have to stay together. Upon entering the house, her mom searched our bags for condoms and birth-control pills. FML

by vistingherfamily / 11/24/2011 at 9:09pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML

by Cassandra / 10/13/2011 at 8:10pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2011 at 10:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother said I am slipping too deep into depression since my boyfriend left for college in Fresno. Her solution: buying me a vibrator. FML

by kdmoney / 09/23/2011 at 2:16am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

by Prinpette / 09/20/2011 at 5:20pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

by piece of shed / 08/31/2011 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I went to my doctor for a check-up. It started with the doctor lifting my shirt up to check my heartbeat, and ended with my gran starting a fistfight over his "perverted ways." FML

by sad child / 08/27/2011 at 3:45am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy if he bit me on the lips. Normally, I would have enjoyed it, if the lips in question were the ones on my face. FML

by RainCl0ud / 08/27/2011 at 2:08am / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2011 at 2:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML

by WTFwhywouldyoudothat / 08/22/2011 at 6:10pm / United Kingdom (Rotherham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 3:42am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom (Bexley) / Animals

Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML

by secret dancer / 08/16/2011 at 12:55pm / Sweden (Jonkopings Lan) / Work

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Transportation