About jaimerose21 : Blondes have more fun
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Today, my 20-year-old daughter staggered into my room at two in the morning, drunker than I ever thought a person could be, screaming for me to make pancakes for her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28554) - you deserved it (6411)
On 02/27/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Ugh (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33783) - you deserved it (1504)
On 02/07/2013 at 4:51am - misc - by fviz (woman) - United States
Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37330) - you deserved it (4143) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version
Today, I went to a urinal next to an elderly gentleman. As I was doing my business, he zips up and begins to leave. On his way out, he leans over my shoulder and whispers in my ear, "That's nice". FML
I agree, your life sucks (28991) - you deserved it (2002)
On 12/26/2012 at 11:03pm - misc - by hborkowski (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my girlfriend got into the Christmas cheer while giving me a hand job, smashing my nuts with her palm in time to her humming of Jingle Bells. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16055) - you deserved it (2440)
On 12/02/2012 at 6:39pm - intimacy - by fineididntwantkidsanyway (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer, until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18311) - you deserved it (1340)
On 08/20/2012 at 5:14am - misc - by scared to leave the house (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17051) - you deserved it (4366)
Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25600) - you deserved it (5041)
On 01/15/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by anonymous - United States
Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10770) - you deserved it (27385) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28192) - you deserved it (2761)
On 03/10/2010 at 11:08am - love - by sliceddice (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)
Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36147) - you deserved it (17611)
On 08/27/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (91415) - you deserved it (27398)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, I woke up from a nap to hear my roommate having some intimate time with his hand. The slopping and slurping sounds along with the girly man squeal as he finished haunted me all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51872) - you deserved it (2923)
On 07/10/2009 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Iraq (Arbil)
Today, I was crocheting while watching television, and thinking to myself how proud I was that I taught myself to crochet. Then, an episode of Golden Girls came on, and I watched that while I crocheted. I'm 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21403) - you deserved it (28266)
On 04/22/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (121287) - you deserved it (3827)
On 03/06/2009 at 5:20pm - health - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Sunday 12 May 2013
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