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jacobsnowboard

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jacobsnowboard

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 767
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About jacobsnowboard : Snowboarding and golf are my life!

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jacobsnowboard's favorite FMLs

Today, my current boyfriend and my ex-boyfriend got into a fight about when my birthday is. They were both wrong. FML

#20464240
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40663) - you deserved it (5075)

On 01/17/2013 at 9:06am - love - by EmberLove (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36533) - you deserved it (3832)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30870) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29693) - you deserved it (9247)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

Today, a girl I follow on Twitter tweeted, "Why can't I have a cute math tutor?" I'm her math tutor. FML

#20459715
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34035) - you deserved it (3645)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my wife brought my 5-year-old daughter to visit me at the office. My boss has a speech impediment, and when she heard it, she exclaimed, "Hey my daddy can sound just like you! Show him daddy! Show him!" FML

#20454855
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19230) - you deserved it (39144)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend that I'm so happy we met one another. She muttered, "Well, that makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29238) - you deserved it (2821)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my girlfriend that my identical twin and I are not in fact related, that he's adopted, and that the only reason we look exactly the same is because we eat and drink the same things. She actually believed it. FML

#20453003
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32440) - you deserved it (8767)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:20am - misc - by datingablonde - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45170) - you deserved it (5977)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30714) - you deserved it (8778)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49328) - you deserved it (4756)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML

#20189568
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38683) - you deserved it (3150)

On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)

Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML

#20173702
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27783) - you deserved it (5879)

On 11/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by but I tried anal and everything (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I came back home in tears, and eventually told my dad what was wrong. He immediately excused himself to the living room, where I heard him tell my mum, "She's gone all Taylor Swift again." FML

#20159285
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21512) - you deserved it (10049)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:48pm - love - by notalovestory (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML

#20157197
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29048) - you deserved it (2588)

On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)



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