Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jackiemonster

Search for a member

jackiemonster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 820
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jackiemonster : in ruins. & seventeen.

jackiemonster's page activity

Visits<b>Naitras</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 1:09am

jackiemonster's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of jackiemonster's badges

jackiemonster's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to court to file a small claim and found myself at the end of a huge line. The moment I got to the front of the line, the fire alarm went off and we all had to leave the building. The moment I got outside, the alarm stopped and everybody rushed back in. I'm at the back of the line. FML

#18461010
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40955) - you deserved it (3328)

On 12/08/2011 at 3:41pm - money - by Dante178 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML

#18460733
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21228) - you deserved it (29145)

On 12/08/2011 at 2:58pm - misc - by picklemonger - Canada

Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML

#18429181
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43731) - you deserved it (3553)

On 12/04/2011 at 5:47pm - love - by Mary - United States

Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML

#18428813
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18695) - you deserved it (41968)

On 12/04/2011 at 4:39pm - intimacy - by wowthatwould (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

#18403998
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53505) - you deserved it (2978)

On 12/01/2011 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by sometingwong (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31344) - you deserved it (3785)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I chipped a tooth trying to solve a Rubik's Cube. FML

#18343530
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9624) - you deserved it (25489)

On 11/25/2011 at 1:27am - health - by yollew - United States (Oregon)

Today, during my boyfriend's family reunion, I started my period but didn't have any tampons. I asked my boyfriend to ask his mom if she had any. I sat on the toilet waiting, then heard him loudly ask his whole family "Does anybody have a tampon my girlfriend can have?" FML

#18343392
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31690) - you deserved it (3986)

On 11/25/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Jessie - United States

Today, I went to the orthodontist. The lady took a break and went to use the restroom. Apparently she didn't bother to take her gloves off, and they smelled like straight up pee. She had her hands in my mouth for over an hour. FML

#18316654
306 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41254) - you deserved it (7630)

On 11/22/2011 at 1:06pm - health - by Bob - United States (Texas)

Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML

#18316587
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25342) - you deserved it (2839)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:53pm - health - by haileyjunkin -

Today, a woman and her daughter came into the store I work at. The girl placed a pair of underpants on the counter, and confessed she had stolen them earlier. Assuming she had already heard a lecture, I simply thanked her for bringing them back. Her mom yelled at me for not yelling at her. FML

#18304888
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30955) - you deserved it (2913)

On 11/21/2011 at 2:02am - work - by disciplinaryaction (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was called by a restricted number. The man on the phone then explained to me in detail what I was doing at every second that I was on the phone with him. I'm scared to leave my house. FML

#18304644
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45841) - you deserved it (2820)

On 11/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by bizzyizzy0121 - United States

Today, my 11 year old sister deleted me off Facebook because I'm not "cool enough" to be seen on her profile. FML

#18302175
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26507) - you deserved it (5026)

On 11/20/2011 at 9:21pm - kids - by sourcandy013 - United States (Florida)

Today, I caught my husband once again looking at half naked pictures of a friend of mine on Facebook. When I asked why he did it, he said "I was checking to see if they were still there." FML

#18296145
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27400) - you deserved it (4501)

On 11/20/2011 at 6:31am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went outside for a cigarette since I don't like smoking in the house. When I was done, I stomped it out. I wasn't wearing shoes. FML

#18291679
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9173) - you deserved it (59730)

On 11/19/2011 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: