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jacetopia96

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jacetopia96
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 September 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 1380
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About jacetopia96 : My name is Jason and I think that FML is probably the best time killer. Love that they have an app for my iPod Touch.

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jacetopia96's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss sent me to a meeting with a client I've never met to do some damage control and renegotiate his contract. For two hours, he alternated between threatening to sue us, and making vulgar comments about raping me in his office. FML

#13962555
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30732) - you deserved it (2502)

On 11/24/2010 at 2:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. She wants to try dating women. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

#13857180
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38141) - you deserved it (5804)

On 11/15/2010 at 8:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while eating dinner with my family, I found out my boyfriend recorded me screaming while having sex with him on my phone, and set it as my ring tone on high volume. FML

#13822314
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27510) - you deserved it (4949)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was fooling around a bit with my girlfriend while cooking dinner when she said, "Don't get too excited, I want to watch The Princess and the Frog tonight." I just got cockblocked by a Disney movie. FML

#13817966
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31840) - you deserved it (6383)

On 11/12/2010 at 6:48pm - intimacy - by roberto (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43593) - you deserved it (16156)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my sister. I was happily biting into a burrito, when I saw a man in his car in the restaurant parking lot, staring at us and jacking off. FML

#13774014
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32042) - you deserved it (3284)

On 11/09/2010 at 2:51am - intimacy - by secretdoll (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML

#13624785
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23182) - you deserved it (3254)

On 10/28/2010 at 8:07am - animals - by scratchpost (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35171) - you deserved it (8331)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was visiting my boyfriend, who lives 2 hours away. After about twenty minutes of glorious sex, he told me in no uncertain terms that he was about to come. He then "baaa"d like a sheep as he came. I couldn't come after that. FML

#13291298
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24970) - you deserved it (3605)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:31pm - intimacy - by seriously (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend told me to stop saying "I love you" so much because it's starting to annoy her. FML

#13055136
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20058) - you deserved it (13068)

On 09/14/2010 at 10:43pm - love - by migsman (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, for my mom's birthday, we went camping. At night, my mom and her boyfriend decided to have "Birthday Sex" because they thought everyone was asleep. Trying to not make it awkward for me and my friend that I brought along, I kept still. Soon, I heard my friend going to town on herself. FML

#12552368
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42008) - you deserved it (4265)

On 08/16/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36091) - you deserved it (9466)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML

#10667407
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40073) - you deserved it (10422)

On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend told me I look like a fish gasping for breath when I "finish" during sex. FML

#8605732
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15153) - you deserved it (3700)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:05am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Montana)



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