Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

j_cat187

Online | Search for a member

j_cat187

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 August 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3443
  • Number of comments : 2287
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About j_cat187 : I'm not wearing pants.

j_cat187's page activity

Visits<b>wassuploves</b> - yesterday at 11:14pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 10:39pm<b>michouchoubou</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 6:30pm<b>sp4ghetti</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 12:45am<b>travisrwr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:28pm<b>bellles</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 5:16pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 2:45pm<b>lowj007</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 2:23pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 1:01pm<b>Quackadoodledoo</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 12:50pm<b>DaggNabbit</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:33pm<b>blairebelle</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:03pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 8:12pm<b>angelk19</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 1:29pm<b>popey714</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 11:42am<b>Pwib</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:51am<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:32am<b>FMLreaderLeL</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:09pm

Liked!<b>Pwib</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 7:51am<b>lewis130</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 6:14am

j_cat187's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of j_cat187's badges

j_cat187's favorite FMLs

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML

#17460856
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (5710)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad told me that after my two older siblings were born, he got a vasectomy. However, something went wrong, and the vasectomy had failed, resulting in me. FML

#17448755
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30856) - you deserved it (2678)

On 08/12/2011 at 9:14am - kids - by LuckySperm (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, at work in a liquor store, a man came in to demand a refund because after he "drank the whole bottle of Jack" he "couldn't get it up" for his wife. He thought that alcohol was supposed to be an aphrodisiac, and blamed me personally for his "whiskey dick". FML

#17415009
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31093) - you deserved it (2674)

On 08/09/2011 at 2:24am - intimacy - by OyGeeze28 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML

#17403916
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36910) - you deserved it (6680)

On 08/08/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by ApparentDrugAddict (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

#17080549
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20285) - you deserved it (52311)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by 44haley44 - United States

Today, a business man in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#17017856
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53284) - you deserved it (3099)

On 07/07/2011 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

#16978964
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28794) - you deserved it (3805)

On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

#16932520
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31423) - you deserved it (3511)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

#16871149
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23106) - you deserved it (35874)

On 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by kaplwv116 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML

#16847494
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30756) - you deserved it (2715)

On 06/25/2011 at 8:58am - health - by Live02Dance - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to address a flatulence issue with an employee. Other employees are complaining about the smell. I have to continue addressing the issue until it stops. So far, I've talked to her about it 4 times. No end in sight. FML

#16812310
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25450) - you deserved it (2697)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:17am - work - by luroluro - United States

Today, I Googled myself. I found my mugshot and a blog my mom had written about how much of a problem child I am. FML

#16785194
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29251) - you deserved it (20788)

On 06/21/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by badgirl (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, the only person I actually spoke with was a prank caller. I tried to have a conversation with him, but he hung up on me. FML

#16761354
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27541) - you deserved it (7252)

On 06/20/2011 at 10:59am - misc - by m2k (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML

#16758524
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14739) - you deserved it (35367)

On 06/20/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by NewTenant (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave a girl answers to a test. She said she would give me something pleasurable in return. She gave me a Twinkie, saying, "I know how much fat people love twinkies." FML

#16207509
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25538) - you deserved it (35030)

On 05/16/2011 at 3:34pm - misc - by pyroman1127 - United States (Utah)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: