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j_cat187

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j_cat187

7Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 August 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3791
  • Number of comments : 2305
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About j_cat187 : I'm not wearing pants.

j_cat187's page activity

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j_cat187's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

#17627685
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15677) - you deserved it (53418)

On 08/31/2011 at 3:36am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML

#17558329
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9190) - you deserved it (45086)

On 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by Kendal - Canada (Ontario)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34839) - you deserved it (9640)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML

#17460856
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28473) - you deserved it (5715)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad told me that after my two older siblings were born, he got a vasectomy. However, something went wrong, and the vasectomy had failed, resulting in me. FML

#17448755
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30913) - you deserved it (2688)

On 08/12/2011 at 9:14am - kids - by LuckySperm (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, at work in a liquor store, a man came in to demand a refund because after he "drank the whole bottle of Jack" he "couldn't get it up" for his wife. He thought that alcohol was supposed to be an aphrodisiac, and blamed me personally for his "whiskey dick". FML

#17415009
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32077) - you deserved it (2770)

On 08/09/2011 at 2:24am - intimacy - by OyGeeze28 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML

#17403916
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36963) - you deserved it (6690)

On 08/08/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by ApparentDrugAddict (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

#17080549
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20316) - you deserved it (52373)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by 44haley44 - United States

Today, a business man in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#17017856
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53360) - you deserved it (3105)

On 07/07/2011 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

#16978964
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28858) - you deserved it (3808)

On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

#16932520
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31511) - you deserved it (3513)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

#16871149
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23140) - you deserved it (35929)

On 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by kaplwv116 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML

#16847494
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30810) - you deserved it (2718)

On 06/25/2011 at 8:58am - health - by Live02Dance - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to address a flatulence issue with an employee. Other employees are complaining about the smell. I have to continue addressing the issue until it stops. So far, I've talked to her about it 4 times. No end in sight. FML

#16812310
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (2745)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:17am - work - by luroluro - United States

Today, I Googled myself. I found my mugshot and a blog my mom had written about how much of a problem child I am. FML

#16785194
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29303) - you deserved it (20822)

On 06/21/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by badgirl (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)



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