Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

izzybd

Offline (yesterday at 8:56pm) | Search for a member

izzybd

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 June 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2572
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About izzybd : My name is Isabelle. I am a dedicated music lover and musician.

I play guitar/piano and I am a singer :)

izzybd's page activity

Visits<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 9:26am<b>OlChickenBeard</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 9:39pm<b>Chocherz</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:16pm<b>tiptoe55</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 9:46am<b>423</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 8:02pm<b>bananasandbutts</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:51pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:53pm<b>dEnVeRkUsH</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:48am<b>fml85483</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 11:25pm<b>jellybeens</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 6:52pm<b>Bluebl4ze</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 4:40am<b>adameeo</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 3:24pm<b>ilovetraveler</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:34am<b>jettli128</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 3:33pm<b>JeremyO777</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 2:58pm<b>davincidasecond</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 2:21pm<b>forevralone</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 1:53pm<b>2i1337i2iscore</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:37am

izzybd's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of izzybd's badges

izzybd's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

#20742647
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51451) - you deserved it (3669)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by o_O (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

#20741232
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50009) - you deserved it (11648)

On 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

#20739366
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68796) - you deserved it (6549)

On 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

#20728225
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47133) - you deserved it (3764) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by Sovekipisse (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he discovered that if he hits a certain area just right, my leg starts shaking like a dog. Now he won't stop patting my head and saying, "Who's a good girl?!" FML

#20727770
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58318) - you deserved it (9155)

On 06/15/2013 at 4:26pm - intimacy - by woof woof?? (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at a family reunion, my visibly drunk grandparents heard about my new boyfriend, who is a cop. My gran asked if he ever made me feel like Rodney King in the bedroom. Then my grandpa, fresh off a DUI, asked if my boyfriend's dick is as bent as the police force. FML

#20727456
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39993) - you deserved it (3703)

On 06/15/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47851) - you deserved it (20218)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72926) - you deserved it (7217)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

#20698818
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81469) - you deserved it (5564)

On 06/01/2013 at 3:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60451) - you deserved it (9135)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was excited for my first date in a while, with a "tall handsome business man." Turns out he "doesn't feel emotions anymore", likes getting peed on, and "doesn't do condoms." Thanks, internet dating. FML

#20620574
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52844) - you deserved it (14155)

On 04/25/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's a lesbian. And that she could only stay with me because I had a "girly face and voice". She also admitted to having a crush on my sister. FML

#20600192
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55351) - you deserved it (4707)

On 04/17/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by wut... (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50492) - you deserved it (10847)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47291) - you deserved it (4877)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

#20581667
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63632) - you deserved it (3047)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: