Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

izzie321

Offline (the 10/15/2014 at 5:31am) | Search for a member

izzie321

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4013
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About izzie321 : Hello! My name is Izzie (Short for Isabella) I did MMA for awhile, I do track, I ride horses, and I play both Playstation and Xbox, but I prefer Playstation. I love my best friend, Mary Jane ;) I get pissed off easily so don't fuck with me. I'm bisexual and my kik is "boxerlola". NO NUDES. I REPEAT, NO NUDES. Don't molext me. That's not ok.

izzie321's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Perfectly_Killer</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 8:42am<b>abattior</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 12:03am<b>yoimtrollin</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 2:54pm<b>lior778</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 8:08pm<b>JoshuaOdom</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 6:33pm<b>lifelikedat</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 12:56am<b>TheSovietOnion</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 5:24pm<b>CarlyMarDry</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 10:17am<b>killer0689</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 5:59am<b>DerpyDerpinator</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 4:12am<b>leigh_xx</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 5:11am<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 1:17pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 9:28pm<b>dragonrider1959</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:57pm<b>hope27</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 10:14pm<b>lb562</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:51pm<b>let_me_touch_it</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 12:52am

izzie321's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of izzie321's badges

izzie321's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30789) - you deserved it (4353)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, while on vacation, my parents called to inform me that my best friend had died in a car accident. Why? To trick me into tearfully confessing my love for him. It worked. FML

#21272324
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46039) - you deserved it (3815)

On 10/06/2014 at 9:14pm - love - by whywouldyoudothat - United States (Arizona)

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I was a test tube baby. He looked at me with confusion before asking, "But if scientists made you, surely you'd be really attractive and talented and stuff?" FML

#21272259
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37365) - you deserved it (3740)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:47pm - misc - by thanks babe - United Kingdom (Shropshire)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

#21271247
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38322) - you deserved it (2466)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:48pm - health - by Eww - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

#21270163
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41710) - you deserved it (3615)

On 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by oncehipjr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my colleague and I played yet another wonderful game of 'Tapeworm or Toilet Paper?' in the homeless shelter's toilets we were asked to clean. FML

#21270023
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29064) - you deserved it (3340)

On 10/03/2014 at 7:29am - work - by whydoidothis (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I thought I was finally over my anxiety problem, and confidently went to my first ever job interview. Halfway through, the manager tells me that if I didn't stop being so nervous, he couldn't give me the job. I cried. FML

#21269405
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36402) - you deserved it (4131)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:56am - work - by rejected - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML

#21268536
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37375) - you deserved it (7557)

On 09/30/2014 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out I have an STD, courtesy of my girlfriend. Funnily enough, she was clean when we first started dating. FML

#21267650
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42650) - you deserved it (3822)

On 09/29/2014 at 12:48pm - health - by impure - United States

Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He told me one of my lights was busted, and I couldn't help but point out that one of his was out too. He said, "Thanks, I'll get that fixed right away." then gave me a ticket. FML

#21267623
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36571) - you deserved it (5677)

On 09/29/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31970) - you deserved it (3544)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44961) - you deserved it (3473)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up. He greeted me with a winning smile, a belch, and the words, "Nice tits." I'm beginning to lose hope. FML

#21265612
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34061) - you deserved it (3210)

On 09/26/2014 at 2:56am - love - by bri_sci94 - United States (Wisconsin)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: