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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14121) - you deserved it (983)
On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17387) - you deserved it (2045)
On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I have my first university lecture on lab safety. Having gone out the night before with my house-mates, I have the worst hangover of my life, and have to listen for an hour and a half while they loudly demonstrate the types of alarms we'll hear in different kinds of emergencies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3343) - you deserved it (12436)
On 11/02/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by ...loud noises...urgh... (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, the girl my boyfriend cheated on me with posted pics of them kissing on Facebook, and tagged me in them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (1068)
On 10/08/2011 at 9:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18730) - you deserved it (2145)
On 10/07/2011 at 10:58am - work - by Dr.Octopus454 (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24683) - you deserved it (5006)
On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36556) - you deserved it (3312)
On 08/11/2011 at 8:56am - intimacy - by bob - United States (Texas)
Today, while my mom was out, I took the car out to CVS to get some food, even though I'm not legally allowed to drive. As soon as I got back in the car, my mom pulled up 2 parking spaces away from me. She didn't notice me bend down to hide... until I accidentally hit the horn in the process. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4769) - you deserved it (36167)
On 11/23/2010 at 1:23pm - misc - by horn-y (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my best friend was doing my hair. She got frustrated and exclaimed, "It won't stay!" I replied with, "Just like your mom!" It was then that I remembered her mom had just left her dad and moved out of the house to be with someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5702) - you deserved it (35347)
On 10/17/2010 at 1:17pm - misc - by Nobody - United States (Texas)
Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14068) - you deserved it (17274)
On 10/17/2010 at 2:28am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25970) - you deserved it (27673)
On 09/17/2010 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my ex-boyfriend's mother came up to me at school, yelling and causing a scene in front of everyone for breaking her son's heart. We broke up over a year ago because he was cheating on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26535) - you deserved it (1459)
On 09/16/2010 at 12:23pm - love - by whatabitch (woman) - United States (California)
Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12493) - you deserved it (2062)
On 03/15/2010 at 5:14am - intimacy - by shygurl434 - United States (Alaska)
Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML
I agree, your life sucks (21159) - you deserved it (4681)
On 03/12/2010 at 8:17am - love - by justlittleoldme (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I thought I lost my wallet. Canceled my bank cards. Bought a new wallet. Got a $141 parking fine at the motor registry while getting my replacement license which also cost me $22. Went to go to the gym and when I went to put my bike jacket on, felt something inside the sleeve. My wallet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5094) - you deserved it (16495)
On 03/12/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
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