itssosparkly

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itssosparkly

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 7 June 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4391
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About itssosparkly : This is me. What do you want to know? I am a human that enjoys classic activities such as the seven processes of life. My weakness is bullets.

As far as this site is concerned, I just...wander around aimlessly. If something semi-amusing and relevant shows up in my head, I'll post it. If not, I'll keep wandering. Hence my lack of activity.

itssosparkly's page activity

Visits<b>Cbjhockeyfan</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 10:52am<b>mlm05232011</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:33pm<b>Vkfan</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 9:34pm<b>InnocenceBlue</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 7:44am<b>Unknown939</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 10:41am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 2:24am<b>Wolfipoo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 11:34am<b>tastyhydra</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:40pm<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 8:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 6:52am<b>Lowhunter</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 1:26pm<b>JazzHandsFML</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 2:36pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:21pm<b>kittyninja19</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 2:35pm<b>yodaman9910</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 4:51pm<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 6:11pm<b>liamtx00</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 9:07am<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 11:30am

Fucked!<b>Wolfipoo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:34pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 12:52pm<b>kittyninja19</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 8:34pm

itssosparkly's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of itssosparkly's badges

itssosparkly's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a ballet recital with my friend, sitting between her and the mother of the head male ballerina. When he came on stage in obscenely tight white tights I whispered to my friend, "You can see his whole freaking package!" I'd whispered to the wrong side. FML

by lalalohan / 04/17/2009 at 11:19am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

by tvaladie / 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

by blizzard_of_77 / 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

by blovesg / 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I was on MSN with my friend and my 9 year old brother. My friend asked me for some advice about how to give a guy a good blowjob. I went into great detail, and then realised that I had typed it to the wrong window. I gave my little brother tips on how to perform fellatio. FML

by imsorrytimmy / 04/02/2009 at 11:34am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Intimacy

Today, I was called by my 9 year old son's teacher. He had handcuffed himself to his desk with handcuffs he found in my room. I was told to please bring in the key and not to leave my kinky toys out where a child could get them. I'm a cop. FML

by poo_shoe123 / 03/31/2009 at 4:47pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, while walking to class enjoying the warmer weather, a bee flew down my shirt. I'm allergic to bees so I freaked out and started ripping my clothes off. By the time I was done, I was half naked and there was no bee in sight. Turns out, it was the string on my jacket hood. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2009 at 2:45pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

by emkaycutie / 03/29/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to cheat on my math test by writing a couple of equations on my hand. Totally satisfied, I handed my test in feeling like I had aced it. As I was heading toward the door, I happily waved goodbye to my teacher. She saw everything. FML

by rutho / 03/27/2009 at 12:39am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to convince my boyfriend that I am NOT a dumb blonde. After screaming at the top of my lungs, I tripped over a bin and hit my head on a wall. FML

by blondie / 03/24/2009 at 7:10pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I went to my friend's house. While she went to the kitchen, I noticed a little pink pastry on her desk. It looked really good, so I decided to take a bite before she got back. As I bit into it, a sizzling noise started, and foam overflowed in my mouth. It was a bath bomb. FML

by skywayavenue / 03/19/2009 at 1:09am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML

by gentileman / 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy