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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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itsTiffany

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itsTiffany
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 July 1993 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 85698
  • Number of comments : 168
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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itsTiffany's favorite FMLs

Today, my father sent me a letter in the mail. He spelled my first name wrong on the front of the envelope. I'm turning 28 years old and my own father doesn't know that my name has two "t"s in it. FML

#1980340 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (35092) - you deserved it (2027)

On 05/16/2009 at 1:49pm - misc - by bclark (man) - United States (North Carolina)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend of 8 years dumped me. When I asked if there was another guy, she responded, "You were the other guy". FML

#950316 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (102922) - you deserved it (7130)

On 04/13/2009 at 1:39pm - love - by blaise (man) - United States (New York)

Today, for Easter my brother & sister both got $200 gifts from my parents. I got a chocolate egg. I'm allergic to chocolate. FML

#924153 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (94154) - you deserved it (3820)

On 04/12/2009 at 9:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work, I noticed a spider on a female co-worker's shirt. I gently brushed it off. She accused me of sexual harassment. FML

#915441 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (40478) - you deserved it (11066)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:41pm - work - by bdawg923 (man) - United States (New York)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to dinner with my boyfriend. After we ordered, I started to unzip his fly really slowly. As I put my hand in his boxers, he stands up to greet his mom and dad who were joining us for dinner. FML

#868136 (279)

I agree, your life sucks (13390) - you deserved it (72922)

On 04/08/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by cdoyle - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

#837103 (577)

I agree, your life sucks (40701) - you deserved it (114325)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by FML.. (woman) - China (Hebei)

Today, completely nude, I had to collect my clothes around the boy’s apartment I have been sleeping with for awhile. While his girlfriend watched to make sure I “got the fuck out.” FML

#800940 (233)

I agree, your life sucks (26324) - you deserved it (116068)

On 04/04/2009 at 3:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML

#741988 (287)

I agree, your life sucks (72972) - you deserved it (12568)

On 04/01/2009 at 4:16am - misc - by highleyj (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad was on the couch and I sat down next to him. As I was reading a text message, I saw my dad's fat stomach sticking out so I patted it. After the first two pats, I realized I was patting in the wrong place. I patted the family jewels. FML

#740213 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (15323) - you deserved it (56418)

On 04/01/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by whatashame (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend I needed someone to talk to because I just found out my aunt has cancer. She told me to talk to her in an hour, Spongebob was on. FML

#736026 (169)

I agree, your life sucks (48968) - you deserved it (3494)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (21856) - you deserved it (81302)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733 (538)

I agree, your life sucks (34532) - you deserved it (220479)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (363068) - you deserved it (401417)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied: "that's okay, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML

#214447 (170)

I agree, your life sucks (39706) - you deserved it (97618)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:01am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. Being the stud that I am, after a short time I turned to her and said "You think you're ready for a round two?" She replied "No, but I do think I'm ready for the rest of round one." FML

#204444 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (17176) - you deserved it (81079)

On 03/04/2009 at 2:03am - intimacy - by saddude (man) - United States (District of Columbia)