iplaylax

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iplaylax

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4562
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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iplaylax's page activity

Visits<b>Sj1147</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 6:12pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 12:56pm<b>chrissy0</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 3:52am<b>mikuxxhatsune</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 9:57pm<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 3:21pm<b>ElMarsho</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:40pm<b>PickledSweets</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 3:55pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 11:57pm<b>rylaii</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 7:10am<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:13pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:11am<b>Kiernan151</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:12am<b>senpai_kush</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:24pm<b>Viscouz</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 11:52am<b>ethan_unoxx</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 6:03pm<b>Kazze</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 2:16pm<b>u_must_die</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:29pm<b>OBTrice</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:52pm

iplaylax's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

iplaylax's favorite FMLs

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

by grossuncle / 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, things heated up with the new guy I've been seeing for a couple of weeks, he kept saying things like "I want you so bad" and "it's going to take hours" to the point that I was so hot, I decided to go for it. Apparently he has "a problem sometimes" getting it up. FML

by unsatisfied / 01/31/2010 at 7:20pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I cut myself deeply with an expensive razor that advertised it's impossible to cut yourself with. Twice. Guess I always was an overachiever. FML

by Thorin / 01/25/2010 at 4:46pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Health

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

by Concussed / 01/17/2010 at 1:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML

by life_sucks / 01/16/2010 at 1:46pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw". It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parent's house and forgot his phone. FML

by Lisa / 01/02/2010 at 2:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I found the only man who hates sex. He's my boyfriend. FML

by Unsatisfied / 12/16/2009 at 1:15am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to send my boyfriend a sexy picture. I took a close up picture of my face, and, trying to be sexy, had my naked body reflected on a mirror in the background. First thing he says: "Who the hell is that guy in the background?" FML

by Not-so-sexy / 12/04/2009 at 7:48am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, after reading a very emotional article about always letting your loved ones know how much you love them in case it's your last time seeing them, I went to my mom and told her how much I loved her and how thankful I was for everything. Her reply? "Shut up kid, Vince Vaughn is on Ellen". FML

by ilovemom / 12/01/2009 at 1:20am / Costa Rica (Heredia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a blind double date with my friend. My date was actually blind. Not so bad, he seemed nice, until he told me I sound ugly and annoying. My friend laughed and agreed. FML

by Anonymous / 11/26/2009 at 12:44pm / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Love

Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend and absent-mindedly began sucking on a marker. He jokingly told me it was sexy, so I continued while making obscene gestures and moans. Suddenly he began to look nervous. I turned around to see my dad looking at me, disgusted and confused. FML

by NotSoSexy / 11/25/2009 at 7:39pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

by yomamma787 / 11/24/2009 at 12:11pm / United States (New Mexico) / Animals

Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML

by WhyTheEff / 11/20/2009 at 6:50pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, since we hadn't been romantic for a long time, I shaved, took a bath, cut my hair and snuggled up to my husband in bed. He got up, went to the computer, masturbated to porn, came back to bed and asked me what was for breakfast. FML

by Inkabadger / 11/20/2009 at 1:41pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was the paramedic at the scene of a car accident. One lady was hurt, and we had trouble getting any information from her as she was sobbing. I radioed in the details and said "...a lady in her mid 30's, ETA 10 minutes." She stopped crying, slapped me, and said, "I'm 28." FML

by Paramedic / 11/17/2009 at 6:16am / United Kingdom (Rochdale) / Work