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iop330

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iop330
  • Town/Country : A hill in the middle of nowhere..., England
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 493
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About iop330 : Hai......

* awkward silence*

So, what am I exactly supposed to put here?

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iop330's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

#20078825
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26946) - you deserved it (1949)

On 09/19/2012 at 2:24am - intimacy - by annonymous - United States

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

#20042325
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19362) - you deserved it (1684)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was driving out to a concert I've been excited about for months. I was using my GPS to guide me to the venue. It decided to guide me to an abandoned warehouse in the middle of town. FML

#20021994
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13884) - you deserved it (2639)

On 08/15/2012 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to a nude picture of my girlfriend. Once I looked at it my morning wood went away. FML

#19886014
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30861) - you deserved it (7951)

On 07/03/2012 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by bob - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24469) - you deserved it (2608)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML

#19684579
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15853) - you deserved it (2577)

On 05/26/2012 at 5:35pm - misc - by Dom - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I had to excuse myself from the classroom so I could have a quick wank. This was because I somehow got extremely horny during a lesson on frog reproduction. FML

#19598772
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10290) - you deserved it (34853)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by polimeros (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)

Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML

Today, my boss fired me because I look like her ex-boyfriend. FML

#18894125
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26079) - you deserved it (1997)

On 01/23/2012 at 9:47pm - work - by moe472 (man) - United States

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37672) - you deserved it (2853)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML

#18346585
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32288) - you deserved it (6883)

On 11/25/2011 at 12:17pm - misc - by 14YearOld (man) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38400) - you deserved it (3847)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, the hillbillies who inhabit the apartment above mine got karaoke machine. It's 1 am and they're singing Achy Breaky Heart. FML

#17715363
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29305) - you deserved it (2812)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:18pm - misc - by 5.9Cummins (woman) - Canada

Today, I checked into a hotel because my boss had assigned me to a new position. As soon as the reception lady looked up, she had me kicked out of the hotel. Apparently, one of the regulations is, "No prostitutes allowed." I was wearing a business suit. FML

#17440698
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (3734)

On 08/11/2011 at 1:58pm - work - by Anonymous - Vietnam (Ha Noi)

Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML

#17035825
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29340) - you deserved it (6781)

On 07/09/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Username - United States



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