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insomnious

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insomnious

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 336
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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insomnious's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:20pm<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/03/2011 at 5:39pm

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insomnious's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

#12714961
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29027) - you deserved it (10043)

On 08/24/2010 at 2:17am - intimacy - by chewybarseventy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a concert and an older man offered to let me stand in front of him because I'm short. It wasn't until the show started and people were jumping around did I realize he had a boner and was repeatedly bumping into me. FML

#8765268
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22126) - you deserved it (2494)

On 03/02/2010 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Lin - United States (California)

Today, after having paid to download an iPhone FML app, I found out that the real 'Fmylife Official' app was a lot more complete. And free. FML

#6567661
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9835) - you deserved it (39643)

On 12/02/2009 at 12:58pm - misc - by Fmyapp (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I discovered my wife has been smoking weed for the past 2 years before she has sex with me. She said it was the only way she could force herself to have sex with me. FML

#4179719
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63000) - you deserved it (6475)

On 07/31/2009 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28439) - you deserved it (85149)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave a campus tour to a group of high school seniors. As I was showing off the dorms, one student asks, "Are these beds sturdy enough for threesomes?" Before I could respond, another kid shouts, "How would he know, I bet the only action he gets in bed is from his left hand." She's correct. FML

#553783
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98268) - you deserved it (10301)

On 03/23/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while changing my tampon in the stall of my high school's bathroom, I lost control of the plastic applicator. The blood-covered apparatus shot out like a rocket underneath the stall door. For a moment I thought no one noticed, then the screaming began. FML

#99894
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49072) - you deserved it (5176)

On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - misc - by isuckatlife (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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