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impatientkarma

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impatientkarma

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 December 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 535
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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impatientkarma's page activity

Visits<b>MasterCheif456</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 9:51pm<b>iZippyZephyr</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:07am<b>Tiger813</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 2:02pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 11:56pm<b>33Got_Game</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 12:42pm<b>Link_Asriel</b> - the 01/23/2011 at 8:15am

impatientkarma's FML badges

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impatientkarma's favorite FMLs

Today, the bartender pulled me aside and told me that she saw my date slip something into my drink. Who was my date? My husband of four years. FML

#8790917
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31477) - you deserved it (2328)

On 03/03/2010 at 12:37am - misc - by holycrap (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex girlfriend that never moved out. FML

#8631765
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28871) - you deserved it (2457)

On 02/25/2010 at 1:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after realizing it burned when I peed, I found out the boy I waited two years to have sex with gave me gonorrhea. FML

#6825049
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23538) - you deserved it (6267)

On 12/19/2009 at 6:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

#6676147
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43123) - you deserved it (2667)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by PoorGramps - United States (Texas)

Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML

#4034101
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40917) - you deserved it (23663)

On 07/25/2009 at 5:14pm - kids - by Mom (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I woke up when the guy I had spent the night with slid out of bed. When he realized I was awake, he looked down at me, shook his head, and said "I've gotta lay off the beer..." FML

#3863732
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47478) - you deserved it (12547)

On 07/18/2009 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by blackntangirl (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on aim, I noticed one of his friends away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said "I can't believe what I stick my d... In sometimes." FML

#3383577
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42158) - you deserved it (11437)

On 07/01/2009 at 12:41am - love - by Bulldogs09 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my friends and I were walking past a bar. There were a few cute guys "rating" every girl that walked by with number cards. My friend, who is a guy, got an 8. I got a 2. FML

#2873732
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39187) - you deserved it (3896)

On 06/14/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by number2 - United States (California)

Today, a man came up to me at the bus stop. He went into this long story about how his girlfriend is pregnant and they both haven't eaten in days. Trying to be tough and funny I said back, "sounds like you should invest in condoms instead of food." He responded by beating and robbing me. FML

Today, one of the Haitians that works in the kitchen at my restaurant said something to me. Usually I can't understand them and I just smile and laugh, so that's what I did this time. Later, I found out he was trying to tell me his father had passed away. FML

#891545
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16762) - you deserved it (52351)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:13pm - work - by ohhhman (woman) - United States

Today, I was having sex with a girl I had just met. After about 5 minutes in, she said she had to go to the bathroom. So we stopped and she went to the bathroom. After waiting around 10 min, I decided to check if she was ok. The window was open. She was gone. FML

#818670
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99068) - you deserved it (33885)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by dfhgblsf (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

#217348
416 comments

I agree, your life sucks (481610) - you deserved it (45997)

On 03/05/2009 at 2:44pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML

#4044
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9605) - you deserved it (45094)

On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)



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