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imaxmain's favorite FMLs
Today, I came home from a weekend trip with some friends, and walked straight in on my girlfriend cheating on me. She burst into tears and began apologizing. Her exact words were "I'm so sorry! I thought you were coming back tomorrow." FML
by cheated / 11/23/2011 at 12:03pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I managed to convince a girl to come back to my place for a bit of fun. Unfortunately, I was wearing cheap new black underwear, and some of its fibers had stuck themselves to my knob, making it look like a weird fleshy caterpillar. I didn't get lucky. FML
by Anonymous / 11/23/2011 at 11:48am / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, a freshman set off the fire alarm in my dorm at 2 a.m. He tried to microwave Easy Mac without adding water. I had to stand outside for 45 minutes while the firemen moved the noodles to the sink and ran cold water over them. FML
by CRC / 11/23/2011 at 10:38am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by jshibbz0993 / 11/23/2011 at 10:16am / United States (Florida) / Money
by Anonymous / 11/23/2011 at 4:36am / United States / Health
Today, I tried to teach my dog tricks. Somehow, I thought it would be easier if I physically showed my dog how to roll, so I rolled on the floor in front of my dog. My sister recorded me and posted it on Facebook. Now everyone thinks I'm an idiot and my dog still can't roll. FML
by bonertoolong / 11/23/2011 at 3:19am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by OCDrunk / 11/23/2011 at 1:40am / Australia (Victoria) / Health
- 1Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation…