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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 November 1984 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 678
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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imaweener's page activity

Visits<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 1:12am

imaweener's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

imaweener's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

by FYouBoyfriend / 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

by today / 03/17/2010 at 2:12am / Intimacy

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

by today / 03/17/2010 at 2:12am / Intimacy

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

by Satan / 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was driving back home after hanging out with some friends. I drove pass a woman standing next to a broken down car. I felt bad, so went back and offered her a ride home. Turns out it wasn't her car and she was a hooker. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 2:47am / United States (North Carolina) / Transportation

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

by anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 1:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get some rest when my dad thought it'd be a good idea to sneak into my room and scare the shit out of me. Literally. FML

by itsEVERYWHERE / 03/08/2010 at 12:34am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend is getting engaged. He broke up with me five months ago because our relationship was too serious for him. FML

by anonymous / 03/07/2010 at 2:20pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

by choldcreations / 03/07/2010 at 9:12am / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2010 at 9:08am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, I bought Plan B for the first time. Not because I had unprotected sex, but to make the cashier think someone would actually sleep with me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/26/2010 at 6:11am / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

by anonymous / 02/21/2010 at 10:16am / United States / Love

Today, while in bed with my game obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

by anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 8:47pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Intimacy