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im_da_man

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  • Number of visits : 1621
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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im_da_man's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:50pm<b>moonlight_daze</b> - the 09/19/2009 at 11:13am

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im_da_man's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML

#17854068
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27514) - you deserved it (2064)

On 09/28/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by JubileeBee (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I bought a UV light so I could detect cat pee, since I was sure my cat was relieving herself on the carpet. I decided to try it out in the living room first. Nearly half the room lit up like a Christmas tree. FML

#17829441
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31380) - you deserved it (4675)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:15pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42949) - you deserved it (4372)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

#17795601
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46364) - you deserved it (8270)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm - intimacy - by ThisBlows (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

#17786255
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50871) - you deserved it (6089)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85485) - you deserved it (13104)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

#17709255
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15143) - you deserved it (31347)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35066) - you deserved it (6145) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend masturbating furiously. To Star Trek. FML

#17657733
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39128) - you deserved it (5622)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by May - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to a text from a girl I had slept with two nights ago. It read, "Please don't get mad if you notice a rash on your private parts. Sorry in advance." FML

#17655668
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24661) - you deserved it (38621)

On 09/03/2011 at 7:49pm - intimacy - by SterlingSilver91 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was DJing on a popular local radio station when a pop-up window appeared on the station's computer. Of all the possible sounds that could have played, it was a girl screaming in pleasure. It went out live on air. FML

#17635803
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32987) - you deserved it (5909)

On 09/01/2011 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by djfail - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML

#17453333
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40090) - you deserved it (4174)

On 08/12/2011 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by -_- - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51234) - you deserved it (9845)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at some point, and for some reason I'll probably never fully understand, it seemed like a good idea to get completely shitfaced on tequila and try to shave my ballsack with a straight razor. I'm not sure if these wounds will ever heal. FML

#17334283
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11712) - you deserved it (65597)

On 08/01/2011 at 5:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my mom washing the dishes completely naked. Sadly, I was more surprised by the fact she was doing the dishes than the fact that that she was strutting about in her birthday suit. FML

#17330120
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31956) - you deserved it (2687)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:55am - intimacy - by notsurprised (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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