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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I was walking home down a small street while listening to my iPod. I really got into the music, and started to dance really badly, only to realise there was a car following me, trying to get past. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5424) - you deserved it (18523)
On 10/22/2010 at 5:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, my boss walked up and smacked my butt. I am a 19 year old guy. My boss is a 50 year old woman. I desperately need this job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25077) - you deserved it (2900)
On 10/21/2010 at 12:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I found out that I have a gluten allergy. What this basically means is that I can't eat anything with wheat in it; bread, pasta, cake, you name it. I am Italian, this basically limits me from eating any of the awesome food my family makes almost every night. Here I come plain rice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27072) - you deserved it (2094)
On 10/20/2010 at 11:12pm - health - by allergic - Sent from mobile version
Today, my doctor confirmed that the extreme pain I've been experiencing is due to a kidney stone. My friend decided this was the time to tell me that passing a kidney stone is the male equivalent of child birth. Hello even more pain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18132) - you deserved it (3546)
On 10/18/2010 at 2:02pm - health - by bjevilcat2 - United States
Today, I was woken by the news that my car had been found, but was completely destroyed due to a fire. I didn't even know my car was missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21220) - you deserved it (1887)
On 10/18/2010 at 11:52am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, I'm going on an 8 hour drive with my insane family. This usually means screaming arguments, graphic conversations about my dad's pubes, some karaoke, plenty of farting, some stale Pringles, and an obese golden retriever on my lap the entire time. Arizona, here we come. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20913) - you deserved it (2677)
On 10/18/2010 at 4:56am - misc - by fmmlll (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was called to reports of a drunk and disorderly male. I arrived to discover a drunk man having explosive diarrhoea in a photo booth. He turned to me me and shouted 'God save the Queen'. It's then that I remembered that it's my job to do something about it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23361) - you deserved it (2213)
On 10/14/2010 at 9:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Reserved
Today, while at my friend's house, I decided to climb up on a shelf and pounce on him when he came back downstairs. When I heard someone coming, I assumed it was him and pounced. It was his grandma carrying the laundry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5224) - you deserved it (28412)
On 10/12/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I woke up to a broken window and 3 guys sitting in my living room watching TV. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27894) - you deserved it (1957)
On 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, I saw a small child take a really bad fall off his scooter, so I got rid of my cigarette and ran to help him. I asked him if he was alright, or if I could walk him to his house. He replied "I'm okay, but your dress is on fire." It was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17719) - you deserved it (10851)
On 09/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by Laura - United States
Today, I took my dogs to an empty park. While they were running around, I laid down in the grass to read a book. Someone thought I was a dead body and called the cops. The police and paramedics showed up. This is the second time it's happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25895) - you deserved it (3254)
On 09/21/2010 at 8:00pm - animals - by tracie (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I dropped my iPod Touch underneath concrete slab steps, and it's physically impossible to get it back. If you stand above where the iPod is, you can still hear it play music. It's like it's mocking me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28170) - you deserved it (4821)
On 09/20/2010 at 7:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I came home to find my drunken father sitting on our front lawn. He had a blanket, lit candle, and was singing with his eyes closed. He told me he believed he was Buddha from watching the history channel. Meanwhile, cars were driving by our house beeping, and yelling "praise the lord!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18291) - you deserved it (1822)
On 09/19/2010 at 10:13pm - misc - by embaressed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I decided to try something new and sign up for an online dating service, since I can't meet a decent guy in person. The first guy I talked to told me he used to be in a mental hospital for obsessing over a girl, then told me he would be dreaming of me that night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24912) - you deserved it (6795)
On 08/29/2010 at 3:45pm - love - by CreepedOut (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was in the car going to a concert with my family. I was listening to my iPod, when the wheel broke and I couldn't change the song. So for the rest of the trip, I was stuck either listening to my parents arguing, or Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin on repeat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19120) - you deserved it (4181)
On 08/28/2010 at 2:07am - misc - by dontworrybehappy (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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