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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48277) - you deserved it (2289)
On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa
Today, I let my friend use my computer to download some music. Now, my computer has 6 viruses and 4 songs, all of which I hate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8735) - you deserved it (15559)
On 11/08/2010 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I received a marriage proposal at work from a 70 year old man covered in dirt from head to toe, who offered to be my "sugar daddy." I guess I have options after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18635) - you deserved it (1941)
On 11/06/2010 at 8:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I spent two hours making a cake that I'd promised my class for weeks. I boarded the train to school, but soon dozed off. A few minutes later, I awoke with a start and noticed a chunk of the cake missing and a homeless man next to me with frosting around his mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19688) - you deserved it (5801)
On 11/04/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I was eating lunch at McDonald's when an older man sat down at the table next to me and told me I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I'm a 20 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24514) - you deserved it (4171)
On 11/04/2010 at 3:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I'm training to be a nurse in a hospital. Our teacher asked for a volunteer to demonstrate how bed restraints work. After I was shackled to the bed she said, "Now let's make sure they work. Are you ticklish?" My entire class tickled me until I screamed, cried and nearly wet my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25222) - you deserved it (3630)
On 11/03/2010 at 8:08am - work - by nurse (woman) - Reserved
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49248) - you deserved it (9964)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25153) - you deserved it (8228)
On 11/03/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by nk (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26919) - you deserved it (2392)
On 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm - misc - by mr_p - United States (Illinois)
Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36114) - you deserved it (4157)
On 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21275) - you deserved it (2242)
On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22701) - you deserved it (3219)
On 10/28/2010 at 8:07am - animals - by scratchpost (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, after having the worst night of my life, my boss chewing me out and acid reflux all morning, I went to the snack machine at work to get the only thing that makes me happy, Reese's PB cups. I had just enough money to buy the very last one in the machine, and it got stuck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23330) - you deserved it (3161)
On 10/26/2010 at 10:46pm - misc - by zzzgrady - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33881) - you deserved it (2943)
On 10/25/2010 at 6:09pm - animals - by sly - United States (Texas)
Today, I was having the most wonderful bath. The water was steaming, the bubbles were bubbly, and I was reading a really good book. I put my book down to yawn and looked to my right. My gaze was met by the lovely face of my brother's pet tarantula. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27154) - you deserved it (2481)
On 10/24/2010 at 8:21am - misc - by mzgabbster (woman) - United States (Utah)
Monday 17 June 2013
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