About ijayp : A smart man learns from his own mistakes, but a smarter man learns from others mistakes. That's what I like about FML.
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ijayp's favorite FMLs
Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML
by oh / 02/22/2016 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was floating on a river with some friends when I accidentally splashed one of their girlfriends in the face. She started crying and everyone gave me the silent treatment for the rest of the trip. We are all 26 years old. FML
by nightwalker2253 / 11/16/2015 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by oops / 09/26/2015 at 10:24pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was signing with my deaf brother at a local McDonald's. We were having a laugh about a game we played last night when this morbidly obese woman waddled over to us. She was utterly convinced we were "talking shit" about her and made a scene about our "hand gestures." Seriously? FML
by Stairs? Noooooo / 09/15/2015 at 6:31pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Iwtumn / 04/30/2015 at 2:15pm / Austria (Steiermark) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/22/2015 at 10:14am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/19/2015 at 11:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had my first therapy session for the issues caused by trying to please my overbearing, paranoid, self-centred mother. The first thing she did after we started driving home? Ranting at me and demanding to know if I'd been "talking shit" about her to my therapist FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2015 at 11:50am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Health
by brazo667 / 02/09/2015 at 6:07pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids
Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hope whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch". Okay then. FML
by retailshell / 01/28/2015 at 10:01am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work
by CCrew42 / 11/20/2014 at 7:27pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by tine / 11/16/2014 at 4:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by elsatheannoyed / 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm / United States (California) / Work
by thebigtwinkie / 09/10/2014 at 3:52am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Love
by weirded out / 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (California) / Work
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…