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About iiazndorkii : Hi. Um. I'm a girl. If you hadn't noticed. I'm a sarcasm-holic, and it's an addict I'm extremely proud of. Fact of the matter is, if you can't handle sarcasm, get out of my way. If that sounded harsh, please go away. If it seemed slightly funny, we could have a nice conversation.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28439) - you deserved it (3854)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States
Today, I went to the doctor for an infection from where a cat bit me while I was sleeping. Where that cat came from and how it got into my bedroom I will never know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25179) - you deserved it (2081)
On 03/13/2011 at 9:19am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my mom and I were escorted out of the KFC because my mom tried to mug and pick a fight with another customer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22001) - you deserved it (2636)
On 02/05/2011 at 4:28pm - misc - by lifesux - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)
Today, I fell over a wet floor sign warning you not to fall over. The irony hurt more than the fall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15394) - you deserved it (6896)
On 02/05/2011 at 4:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38166) - you deserved it (2784)
On 02/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22114) - you deserved it (5028)
On 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by omnomnom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56408) - you deserved it (4916)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I came home from a vacation. It had snowed, so I decided to shovel the front walk. While shoveling, I found a dead skunk frozen solid on the sidewalk. I tried to pick it up with my shovel, but it stuck. It won't move 'til the ice melts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16599) - you deserved it (1848)
On 02/03/2011 at 7:59pm - misc - by theyreallydosmell -
Today, I was attacked by my dad because I got my hair dyed and he thought I was a robber. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18726) - you deserved it (5749)
On 01/31/2011 at 12:47am - misc - by f -
Today, after 2 years together, my boyfriend finally proposed. I excitedly said yes. Just as we began to kiss, my half crazed cat ran in, dropped a half eaten bird at our feet, and promptly threw up on the carpet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18860) - you deserved it (3444)
On 01/30/2011 at 9:34pm - animals - by birdguts (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my little brother discovered that bears can be very territorial and will pee on things to keep others away. He took this new found information to heart and peed on various things in the house that he wanted for himself, including my laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25540) - you deserved it (2203)
On 01/30/2011 at 12:21pm - kids - by Joey - United States (California)
Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37177) - you deserved it (2842) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5645) - you deserved it (42699)
On 01/24/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by moxy -
Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4660) - you deserved it (33655)
On 01/22/2011 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, in gym class, we were forced to learn the "Hoedown Throwdown" dance, by Miley Cyrus. This will actually be counted toward my grade. I'm in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29667) - you deserved it (2881)
On 01/06/2011 at 5:57pm - misc - by UltraHoe69 - United States
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