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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't attend her dog's funeral, and was therefore an insensitive bastard. I couldn't attend because my mum has cancer and I was driving her to a hospital appointment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39806) - you deserved it (2173)
On 12/19/2010 at 7:31pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I went to my Calculus lecture, one of a class of 200 people. As I looked down I noticed that a guy a few rows in front of me was on Facebook. When I took a closer look, I noticed he was viewing my profile. He stalked the profile for a full 45 minutes. I have never met this guy in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29480) - you deserved it (3824)
On 11/24/2010 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I was having a good talk with a coworker and I was excited that I've made my first friend at work. After sharing some stories and some laughs he asked if I had a boyfriend. I said I do. He asked if I was always faithful, I said I was. He then walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23641) - you deserved it (3647)
On 09/29/2010 at 2:33am - work - by csor027 - United States (California)
Today, I was conducting interviews and I could tell this particular candidate was really nervous, so I was extra nice. At the end, he was reluctant to shake my hand. On the way out I realised why: I had lost the top button on my low cut top, and he was nursing his appreciation of the view. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16239) - you deserved it (5817)
On 09/22/2010 at 4:49am - work - by pizzacat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28511) - you deserved it (33926)
On 09/17/2010 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20443) - you deserved it (16700)
On 09/07/2010 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Ashley - United States (California)
Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36227) - you deserved it (1761)
On 08/31/2010 at 3:54am - misc - by missyoudad. (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9484) - you deserved it (33420)
On 08/26/2010 at 5:17pm - intimacy - by Eeeek (woman) - Bulgaria (Varna)
Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30869) - you deserved it (3334)
On 08/17/2010 at 3:10am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan. So I bought her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21309) - you deserved it (14424)
On 07/14/2010 at 11:17am - intimacy - by safetyfirst (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, I found out that my best friend pays my boyfriend to this day to take me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27014) - you deserved it (2022)
On 02/15/2010 at 1:08pm - love - by thirdwheel (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my dad got a hard-on looking at my best friend. He asked me how my NutriSystem diet was going. He was looking at my friend's boobs when he asked me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13297) - you deserved it (1346)
On 02/10/2010 at 7:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my mother and I were driving through Del Taco. Instead of ordering "Macho Diet Coke", she said "Macho Diet Cock". After correcting herself and pulling up to the window, the employee who goes to my high school gave her the drink and his phone number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17739) - you deserved it (1661)
On 02/05/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by MachoFluster (man) - United States (California)
Today, I realized that the only reason my boyfriend has been coming over to hang out at my house for the past two months is because my little brother has an N64. I have become a third wheel to their mario kart dates. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18748) - you deserved it (2636)
On 01/30/2010 at 4:40am - misc - by wowsucks (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (1442)
On 01/26/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by newniece (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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