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ihavfml

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 November 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 328
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About ihavfml : Hello!
FML makes me chuckle :D
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collage!

ihavfml's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of ihavfml's badges

ihavfml's favorite FMLs

Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML

#18713489
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31275) - you deserved it (3712)

On 01/05/2012 at 3:09am - health - by dusk - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

#18626435
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42113) - you deserved it (8104)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I woke up with Skittles super glued to my forehead. FML

#18561350
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (5419)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by awalc - United States

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

#18531722
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30296) - you deserved it (5361)

On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25091) - you deserved it (2490)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)

Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML

#18501899
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25970) - you deserved it (1999)

On 12/13/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

#18501609
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25454) - you deserved it (15895)

On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

#18479276
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48173) - you deserved it (3614)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend forced me to climb out through his window, because he was too embarrassed at the thought of his room-mate finding out I'd spent the night. FML

#18478805
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28189) - you deserved it (4830)

On 12/10/2011 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by FML - United States

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

#18467751
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42200) - you deserved it (5131)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

#18417408
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33236) - you deserved it (5400)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39013) - you deserved it (7735)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

#18222610
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27505) - you deserved it (2468)

On 11/11/2011 at 9:04pm - kids - by Username - United States (Maryland)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18118) - you deserved it (76717)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while cuddling up on the couch with my boyfriend, I asked him if this was his happy place too. He said, "Nah, it's in pussies." FML

#18165328
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29018) - you deserved it (9143)

On 11/05/2011 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by whatadisappointmnet (woman) - United States



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  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

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