Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ihavenosoul

Search for a member

ihavenosoul

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 472
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ihavenosoul's page activity

Visits<b>euphoriagorillaz</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 8:18pm<b>jamjam12</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 1:32am<b>_Jessie_</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 12:20am

ihavenosoul's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of ihavenosoul's badges

ihavenosoul's favorite FMLs

Today, I washed my sheets. They wouldn't dry quick enough, so I had to use my old Buzz Lightyear sheets. My new girlfriend took it upon herself to become a damn psychic and pay me a surprise visit right there and then. FML

#19293658
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20102) - you deserved it (3743)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by babysheets (man) - Uruguay (Montevideo)

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

#19062994
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23518) - you deserved it (4468)

On 02/13/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by cieee - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

#19059708
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27777) - you deserved it (2104)

On 02/12/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my little brother went through all the artistic anatomy reference books and colored in all the nipples and penises with a bright pink sharpie. These books were from the library. FML

#18957870
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21348) - you deserved it (2527)

On 01/31/2012 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML

#18764509
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25848) - you deserved it (6152)

On 01/10/2012 at 4:36am - intimacy - by eakthegeek - United States

Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML

#18758727
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65117) - you deserved it (3124)

On 01/09/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by fuckparents (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it's my anniversary. I've been a single cat-lady for exactly one year. FML

#18756211
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25841) - you deserved it (7773)

On 01/09/2012 at 11:56am - love - by catlady (woman) - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19875) - you deserved it (39126)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML

#18713489
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31240) - you deserved it (3707)

On 01/05/2012 at 3:09am - health - by dusk - United States (Colorado)

Today, a guy rang my doorbell, yelled "Happy Halloween" and then threw a bunch of leaves that he'd lit on fire at me. FML

#18612285
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28262) - you deserved it (2373)

On 12/25/2011 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML

#18605439
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16858) - you deserved it (49829)

On 12/25/2011 at 6:39am - animals - by Anonymoose (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML

#18548047
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21702) - you deserved it (6229)

On 12/18/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

#18338481
490 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45460) - you deserved it (4284)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by haunted (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28142) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to jokingly walk away. Trying to be cute, I tried to pull her onto my knee. I miscalculated and she ended up sitting right on my boner. FML

#18098530
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29855) - you deserved it (17597)

On 10/28/2011 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: