About ihateFMLJkxD : Om&m and Zelda all the way. :D
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29377) - you deserved it (5347)
On 08/12/2011 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Pissedoff777 - United States (Arizona)
Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39750) - you deserved it (3646)
On 08/11/2011 at 8:56am - intimacy - by bob - United States (Texas)
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32538) - you deserved it (9007)
On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)
Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8035) - you deserved it (52839)
On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)
Today, I realized the only reason my boyfriend is dating me is because he has a pimple fetish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32230) - you deserved it (3466)
On 07/30/2011 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22863) - you deserved it (12744)
On 07/29/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55033) - you deserved it (6663)
On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41333) - you deserved it (6110)
On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (28726) - you deserved it (5809)
On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29047) - you deserved it (14971)
On 07/16/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by McKenna - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15780) - you deserved it (41199)
On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41238) - you deserved it (10432)
On 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to a concert with a friend of mine. When his dad came to pick him up, I walked towards the car, expecting a ride. His dad told me he didn't have time to drive me home. I'm his neighbour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33119) - you deserved it (2858)
On 07/13/2011 at 10:48am - misc - by Evan Chong - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31170) - you deserved it (7925)
On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I came across the topic of school while chatting. He asked me what high school I went to and where I moved from. I have lived here my whole life, he was my crush for four years, and was in my classes throughout those years. He doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29565) - you deserved it (2545)
On 07/12/2011 at 8:51pm - love - by steph2052 - United States (Washington)
Monday 17 June 2013
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