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ihateFMLJkxD

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ihateFMLJkxD
  • Town/Country : Miami, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 17 July 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 826
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About ihateFMLJkxD : Om&m and Zelda all the way. :D

ihateFMLJkxD's last visitors

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ihateFMLJkxD's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML

#17446772
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34390) - you deserved it (6901)

On 08/12/2011 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Pissedoff777 - United States (Arizona)

Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML

#17438897
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43048) - you deserved it (4550)

On 08/11/2011 at 8:56am - intimacy - by bob - United States (Texas)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34597) - you deserved it (9281)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML

#17304355
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8168) - you deserved it (53873)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realized the only reason my boyfriend is dating me is because he has a pimple fetish. FML

#17304312
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35972) - you deserved it (4476)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML

#17302566
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23344) - you deserved it (12861)

On 07/29/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML

#17227905
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56992) - you deserved it (6812)

On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46696) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31794) - you deserved it (7250)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML

#17129735
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30391) - you deserved it (15311)

On 07/16/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by McKenna - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18187) - you deserved it (44710)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML

#17107547
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41948) - you deserved it (10568)

On 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to a concert with a friend of mine. When his dad came to pick him up, I walked towards the car, expecting a ride. His dad told me he didn't have time to drive me home. I'm his neighbour. FML

#17092885
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37200) - you deserved it (3721)

On 07/13/2011 at 10:48am - misc - by Evan Chong - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

#17090156
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31672) - you deserved it (7979)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I came across the topic of school while chatting. He asked me what high school I went to and where I moved from. I have lived here my whole life, he was my crush for four years, and was in my classes throughout those years. He doesn't believe me. FML

#17085145
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30133) - you deserved it (2578)

On 07/12/2011 at 8:51pm - love - by steph2052 - United States (Washington)



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