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ignoremeimweird

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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1876
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ignoremeimweird's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out why my teenage daughter won't brush her teeth properly. Apparently my son convinced her that toothpaste has tons of calories. FML

#20092131
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22072) - you deserved it (2194)

On 09/28/2012 at 10:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out why my teenage daughter won't brush her teeth properly. Apparently my son convinced her that toothpaste has tons of calories. FML

#20092131
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22072) - you deserved it (2194)

On 09/28/2012 at 10:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 5-year-old, overweight Siberian Husky tackled me because he thought that my lipstick was food. FML

#20091999
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17234) - you deserved it (5636)

On 09/28/2012 at 6:53am - animals - by emilyhendrix0414 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML

#20090283
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18024) - you deserved it (2293)

On 09/26/2012 at 10:29pm - love - by - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a Justin Bieber shrine in my daughter's closet. FML

#20077908
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28227) - you deserved it (3362)

On 09/18/2012 at 3:51pm - kids - by unfortunateMother (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML

#20072649
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36557) - you deserved it (1982)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML

#20072649
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36557) - you deserved it (1982)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was assigned to write a short story about what we imagine Earth to be like in 500 years, and daily conflicts people experience. My teacher loved it and read it aloud to the class. He asked for my inspiration, and I didn't have the heart to say that I ripped off Mass Effect 3. FML

Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML

#20067114
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (2212)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

#20053776
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26041) - you deserved it (3065)

On 09/02/2012 at 8:44am - love - by rotezora (woman) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)

Today, my little sister came home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML

#20053719
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11174) - you deserved it (27106)

On 09/02/2012 at 6:07am - kids - by The Horrible Older Sister - United States (Arizona)

Today, my little sister came home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML

#20053719
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11174) - you deserved it (27106)

On 09/02/2012 at 6:07am - kids - by The Horrible Older Sister - United States (Arizona)

Today, my little sister came home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML

#20053719
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11174) - you deserved it (27106)

On 09/02/2012 at 6:07am - kids - by The Horrible Older Sister - United States (Arizona)

Today, I have a cold, and was stuck sleeping in bed. My roommate decided to wake me up by sticking headphones in my ears and playing heavy metal on full volume. This is the third time this week. FML

#20049664
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19192) - you deserved it (2189)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:34pm - health - by shadowsorel - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

#20049241
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32626) - you deserved it (1681)

On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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