Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

igive

Offline (yesterday at 1:25am) | Search for a member

igive

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 November 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2176
  • Number of comments : 512
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About igive : I am here for amusement at the posters' expense.

igive's page activity

Visits<b>Nicky816</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:37pm<b>mypro1234</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:18am<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 10:49am<b>14huberzb</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 5:58am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 3:00am<b>DropTheDaggerxx</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:03pm<b>PePziNL</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 7:29pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 8:40am<b>hikurashi83</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 3:28am<b>TheGolfGTI</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 1:48am<b>josewuzhere</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 1:38am<b>xnighttrain21x</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 10:15pm<b>mystery_user</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 8:35pm<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:12pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 8:51am<b>DaniloDanigga</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 9:06pm<b>hamburgerjung</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 3:31pm<b>poncho55</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 2:38pm

Liked!<b>Mindset</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 9:14pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:12am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 2:07am

igive's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of igive's badges

igive's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML

#20507668
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33522) - you deserved it (3675)

On 02/15/2013 at 12:53am - health - by youmindyourownbusiness - United States (Illinois)

Today, I lit my beard on fire while trying to light a cigarette driving to work. I got fired from work when I got there because of my appearance. FML

#20507167
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12901) - you deserved it (40497)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:55pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

#20505035
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28217) - you deserved it (5684)

On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home to find the dog had learned how to open our stair-gate and kitchen door, devoured the entire fruitcake I'd made for a special occasion, and then vomited said fruitcake all over the fabric sofa. FML

#20503420
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25204) - you deserved it (3903)

On 02/12/2013 at 8:18am - animals - by Stoopiddogbot (woman) - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

#20502122
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29624) - you deserved it (27424)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57516) - you deserved it (10887)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was dragged to a Super Bowl party. While there, the host's kid threw 3 cups of apple sauce at my feet, which then exploded and covered my jeans. 10 minutes later, the host's wife announced that she was pregnant with twins. All I could come up with was, "You're making more!?" FML

#20492510
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33151) - you deserved it (5779)

On 02/04/2013 at 12:15am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

#20491900
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30574) - you deserved it (4284)

On 02/03/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by FUCK GOD (man) - Argentina (Salta)

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

#20490582
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48003) - you deserved it (3319)

On 02/02/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML

#20489333
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27983) - you deserved it (8477)

On 02/01/2013 at 6:53pm - misc - by VMV (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I got my retainer fitted. It stimulates my gag reflex so badly that I gag every time I try so say anything with a 'P' in it. My orthodontist laughed and suggested I get a thesaurus. FML

#20485855
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28750) - you deserved it (2370)

On 01/30/2013 at 2:52am - health - by Miss Blairgowrie (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend if she thinks I have a big package. She replied that she didn't want to upset me and get into another fight. FML

#20485057
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25652) - you deserved it (36946)

On 01/29/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by notsobig - United States

Today, during a date, I discovered that if I cough with my mouth closed, snot will spray from my nose all over the place like some kind of mucus cannon. FML

#20484952
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28837) - you deserved it (6289)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML

#20484695
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24689) - you deserved it (9173)

On 01/29/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: