[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

ifmlftw

Search for a member

ifmlftw
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 15 September 1984 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 413
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 14 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ifmlftw's last visitors

didthatreallyhapQTp13Link_Asriel

ifmlftw's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ifmlftw's favorite FMLs

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (14139) - you deserved it (1491)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561 (490)

I agree, your life sucks (4712) - you deserved it (36905)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the bathroom having major diarrhea, when the lights went out. There was no other light whatsoever, so I had to crawl out of the bathroom, butt covered in crap. I managed to hit my head on the stall door, and trip over a bench. All with my pants down. In a public restroom. FML

#7684971 (220)

I agree, your life sucks (16579) - you deserved it (7037)

On 01/29/2010 at 8:27pm - misc - by nixie - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got on a treadmill for the first time. I was running at a very high speed. I needed a break but didn't know how to get off. I decided to just let the machine take me to the edge so I could get off. I was thrown off the treadmill and landed with my happy sacks crashing into a dumbbell. FML

#7231973 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (4384) - you deserved it (24474)

On 01/09/2010 at 5:17am - health - by King7 (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, a car was tailgating and honking at me while trying to pass me, so I decided to be a bitch back and go extremely slow. We got to a two lane road and the car passed me up. The man in the front seat flipped me off while pointing to his wife in the back seat who was clearly in labor. FML

#6896852 (289)

I agree, your life sucks (7200) - you deserved it (41216)

On 12/23/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by lois2lane (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML

#6644782 (14)

I agree, your life sucks (7491) - you deserved it (24171)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by CH (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was walking around in Target with my friends and the guy I've liked for a long time. As we approached the patio section, I sat down on a chair only to hear a big wet watery sound. I got up and realized that I had just sat in some little kid's diarrhea. FML

#6378888 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (32442) - you deserved it (4530)

On 11/20/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend gave me an early wedding present. I opened the box and inside was the most adorable cat I've ever seen! It got scared, jumped out, clawed my face and pissed everywhere. My wedding is tomorrow and I look like Frankenstein's bride. FML

#6366534 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (27195) - you deserved it (2262)

On 11/19/2009 at 8:36am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was sitting in my bed drinking Yoohoo from a juice box. I decided it would be fun to see how much I could fit in my mouth. As soon as my mouth was full, I sneezed. FML

#5948720 (78)

I agree, your life sucks (5802) - you deserved it (24575)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed "holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML

#4981586 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (8984) - you deserved it (29426)

On 09/01/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by becca1417 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

#4053619 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (16747) - you deserved it (39911)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at Target with my mom and we finished purchasing our items. We had gotten a fan so I said,"This thing is too big to fit in." First thing my mom yells? "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" and starts laughing hysterically in front of the entire store. FML

#3692539 (294)

I agree, your life sucks (38597) - you deserved it (8715)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:25pm - misc - by embarrassed (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was in the basement at my grandma's house. The bathroom is on the ground floor and there's a laundry chute that goes down to the basement. I looked through the chute to see if the bathroom light was on. A pair of shitty underpants came down and landed in my face. They were my grandma's. FML

#3078532 (70)

I agree, your life sucks (31345) - you deserved it (7737)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by yuck (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came home from work and had to pee so badly that I ran to the bathroom and ripped my pants down. My touch screen phone dropped from my pocket and started calling my boyfriend. Since I couldn't quite reach the phone, I left a message of me peeing on his cell. FML

#3061560 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (28818) - you deserved it (6285)

On 06/20/2009 at 2:06pm - misc - by WhyTheFNot (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

#2252019 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (8187) - you deserved it (38488)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Tyler_Padgett (man) - United States (Georgia)