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idc

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idc
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  • Number of visits : 9196
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

#1800346
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55159) - you deserved it (5340)

On 05/10/2009 at 1:05am - kids - by sucksforme. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I treated myself to a spa day at home. First, I decided to do a hot oil treatment on my hair. I was leaning over the saucepan of oil on the stove when it flared up in my face. On the bright side, I no longer have to worry about plucking my eyebrows. FML

#1800001
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14713) - you deserved it (36592)

On 05/10/2009 at 12:48am - misc - by torchy (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

#1793303
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27496) - you deserved it (44769)

On 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm - work - by Failoffel (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

#1791192
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22200) - you deserved it (76824)

On 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by Jeremy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

#1775796
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15149) - you deserved it (66130)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:48am - love - by rawkdinosawr (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML

#1766885
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6546) - you deserved it (70926)

On 05/09/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by t-dawg (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML

#1628197
355 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24257) - you deserved it (65692)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)

Today, while watching TV, I danced, sang along, and helped Dora the Explorer get to her Grandmother's house. It was the most fun I've had all year. I'm 21. FML

#1619469
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55020) - you deserved it (26245)

On 05/04/2009 at 5:09am - kids - by Amey (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML

#1592701
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20739) - you deserved it (78253)

On 05/03/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by danggit3290 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me, "what would happen to me if you and daddy died?". I told her that she'd probably live with her Uncle Ant and Aunt Ilene. She looked at me and said "You guys can die. I won't cry. I get everything I want over there." FML

#1551610
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85271) - you deserved it (8273)

On 05/02/2009 at 4:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (162006) - you deserved it (39917)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to a fast-food joint and ordered off the $1.00 menu to save money. Five hours later I go to the hospital with food-poisoning. After a whole day of not eating, crapping, puking, having tests, and a bunch of IV fluids, my $1.00 burger ended up costing me $2,000 in bills. Really. FML

#1547778
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (148602) - you deserved it (22044)

On 05/02/2009 at 12:56am - health - by Sick (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I forgot my inhaler. I had an asthma attack and had to go to the ER. The doctors told me it wasn't an asthma attack. It was just a panic attack from worrying about whether I would get an asthma attack. FML

#1529921
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53459) - you deserved it (15755)

On 05/01/2009 at 5:07pm - health - by jlover42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I rolled down the windows in my car. When I tried to roll up the passenger side window, it was stuck. Rain was coming so I freaked out and brought it to the dealership to get it fixed. The man pushed the child safety lock button and the entire garage erupted in laughter. FML

#1525819
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10792) - you deserved it (55298)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by KMilly (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had an ultrasound in fear of testicular cancer. I apparently signed papers allowing an intern to do it for practice. She was in her early 20s and smoking hot so as she was rubbing jelly on my testes I got an erection. FML

#1525413
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65337) - you deserved it (22424)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by erectioninfection (man) - United States



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