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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (48779) - you deserved it (8758)
On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5211) - you deserved it (42368)
On 08/13/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by soapgirl (woman) - Philippines (Pampanga)
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (58377) - you deserved it (5808)
On 08/13/2009 at 11:23am - intimacy - by esb (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5746) - you deserved it (45759)
On 08/13/2009 at 3:27am - misc - by oldtexas (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, my 15-year-old daughter asked for a ride to her boyfriend's house. It's the same house I've been driving her to for sleepovers with her friend "Kate" for two years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28132) - you deserved it (35262)
On 08/12/2009 at 12:14pm - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1150) - you deserved it (2532)
On 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm - kids - by ahhahaha (man) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44538) - you deserved it (1920)
On 08/11/2009 at 10:05pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mom said that we needed to have a family meeting because of all the issues that have been going on with our family. My mom, sister and I sat down and began to talk about everything. As I started to cry my sister looks at my mom and says "I win!". She bet my mom $20 that I would cry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32324) - you deserved it (5245)
On 08/11/2009 at 4:43am - misc - by amie (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my parents came to the restaurant I work at as a waiter. After, I picked up the check to realize they had left me a $500 tip! We split the tips among the employees so I only got $50 back but I was still psyched. When I got home they asked me if I had noticed that they used my credit card. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47136) - you deserved it (4589)
On 08/07/2009 at 11:23am - money - by goin4broke (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. Halfway through he asked me what day it was. I told him, "Friday." He jumped up and ran over to the TV yelling, "Oh my God! Shark week is almost over!!" I was cock-blocked by the Discovery Channel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38550) - you deserved it (5919)
On 08/07/2009 at 11:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70092) - you deserved it (14845)
On 08/06/2009 at 7:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I borrowed my dad's laptop to type an essay. While I was saving it, I noticed some curious looking files and I opened them. They were rejection letters from all the colleges I had applied to. My dad had been forging them so he wouldn't have to pay for my tuition bills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61621) - you deserved it (1758)
On 08/05/2009 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my brother deleted all traces of the novel I've been working on for three years from my laptop. The reason? When I was born I "stole all of Mum and Dad's attention." He's 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51777) - you deserved it (3804)
On 08/05/2009 at 4:30pm - misc - by frustrated - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34096) - you deserved it (56897)
On 08/05/2009 at 1:28am - intimacy - by unbelievable208 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was eating dinner with my family. My parents didn't want me to hear what they were talking about so they decided they would spell out the words so I wouldn't understand. I didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9505) - you deserved it (39108)
On 08/05/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
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