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Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44706) - you deserved it (7276)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I flew from Australia to the UK to meet the woman I love. After two years of talking, and having gotten a love letter for my birthday a few months prior, I was convinced we'd have a great time. Turns out she doesn't know what she feels for me. I'm staying with her for the next 35 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16606) - you deserved it (6840)
On 12/12/2012 at 10:56am - love - by RabbitOfAurora - United Kingdom (Hounslow)
Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31127) - you deserved it (1605)
On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my elbow was having cramps and movement issues as a result of an old set of surgical pins and wires that are being rejected by my body. One painful twitch caused my arm to lock out straight, unintentionally slapping my hand into my co-worker's crotch. Our waiting customers giggled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14879) - you deserved it (935)
On 12/04/2012 at 2:10am - health - by SApprentice (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14995) - you deserved it (452)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14047) - you deserved it (1369)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:17am - misc - by Stupendous_ - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15469) - you deserved it (1841)
On 12/02/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by :/ (woman) - United States (California)
Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27969) - you deserved it (2709)
On 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by julia (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, this really big woman asked me for some cigarettes. I didn't have any, which made her angry. Angry enough to pick me up, stuff me in a dumpster, and sit on the lid. I still smell like garbage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19365) - you deserved it (1313)
On 11/28/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23604) - you deserved it (2905)
On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14290) - you deserved it (2478)
On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, a shopper approached me at Target and said, "So are you just gonna stand there to look pretty and do nothing around here?" I ignored his comment, until he got so upset that he wanted to speak to my manager. It would have been understandable if I actually worked there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19728) - you deserved it (1207)
On 11/25/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my mom had a tantrum and screamed at me over my use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch and claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8171) - you deserved it (9665)
On 11/24/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by Anonymous Cunt (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, I was at the mall blasting music. I was wearing a nice shirt, and had my iPod in my breast pocket. I noticed a cute girl smiling at me, so I smiled back and as she started to walk over, I turned down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23801) - you deserved it (51230)
On 05/20/2009 at 11:08pm - love - by zero_minded12 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Friday 24 May 2013
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