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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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iMatter

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iMatter
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  • Number of visits : 285
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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iMatter's favorite FMLs

Today, my date kissed me after our second date. The way he leaned towards my mouth was very romantic. He's pretty tall, so I stretched myself as high as possible to make the kiss as passionate as possible. That's how I ended up belching into his mouth. FML

#6482336 (76)

I agree, your life sucks (22918) - you deserved it (6703)

On 11/27/2009 at 6:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML

#6480683 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (6007) - you deserved it (30978)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:24pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found a camera someone left at our house. I looked at the pictures, and saw my grandma in a sexy outfit. FML

#6480509 (59)

I agree, your life sucks (14375) - you deserved it (3670)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, for the third time this week, my boss made me switch desks. Each new desk is closer to the door than the last one. I think he's trying to tell me something. FML

#6479352 (57)

I agree, your life sucks (21054) - you deserved it (1583)

On 11/27/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Fmyoffice (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I got out of the wrong side of the bed. Into a wall. FML

#6475314 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (8712) - you deserved it (17687)

On 11/27/2009 at 5:11am - misc - by Nick (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was opening up to my close friend about my low self esteem. To make me feel better, he told me that he gets a boner whenever he walks behind me. FML

#6474999 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (12204) - you deserved it (4821)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:20am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up early. As I was just about to fall back asleep, I was re-awoken to the sound of my parents doing it in the shower. FML

#6460097 (54)

I agree, your life sucks (13667) - you deserved it (1246)

On 11/26/2009 at 9:19am - intimacy - by whattheshit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to surprise my wife at her softball game. I saw her distinctive motorcycle jacket through the canvas dugout wall and decided that I would feel her up from behind, to surprise her. She lent her jacket to a friend. FML

#6433707 (49)

I agree, your life sucks (9184) - you deserved it (6615)

On 11/24/2009 at 5:58am - intimacy - by rider (man) - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I was working as a Valet driver. After getting no customers for 5 hours in the pouring rain, a woman driving by stops and asks me for directions. Before leaving, she said, "I should probably tip you for that, since that's probably the only money you'd get all night." She didn't. FML

#6190811 (33)

I agree, your life sucks (20044) - you deserved it (1303)

On 11/07/2009 at 12:36am - money - by Tipless (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first random girl he saw. FML

#2822887 (319)

I agree, your life sucks (70552) - you deserved it (6898)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I finished a drawing that I spent over 14 hours working on for my mom for Mother's Day. I took it outside to seal it with fixative. I took of the clear lid, shook the can, then sprayed red spray paint all over my art. FML

#1770130 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (41166) - you deserved it (15564)

On 05/09/2009 at 2:19am - misc - by Mandy - United States (California)



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