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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
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Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59953) - you deserved it (4610)
On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46579) - you deserved it (16165)
On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico
Today, I was walking my dog. A cute guy stopped me and said, "Wow, you are gorgeous!" I said thanks. He looked at me like I was nuts and said, "Not you, your dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35007) - you deserved it (4782)
On 04/25/2013 at 8:11pm - animals - by emma_waters23 - United States (California)
Today, my husband laughed at me for farting in the bathtub; I lied by admitting to it. The fact is that I have enough back-fat to create suction against the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37168) - you deserved it (14045)
On 04/24/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69802) - you deserved it (3085)
On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States
Today, I discovered why my boss kept on scheduling me to work doubles almost every day. It wasn't because she knew I needed the extra money; she was hoping that my boyfriend would break up with me because I'm never home, and date her instead. It worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58195) - you deserved it (3445)
On 04/23/2013 at 4:17am - love - by mybossisanass (woman) - United States
Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28707) - you deserved it (95593)
Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35751) - you deserved it (12278)
On 04/21/2013 at 10:56pm - misc - by Magicali (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I woke up feeling awful, having caught the same illness my boyfriend had last night. When he was sick, I skipped my friend's baby shower to take care of him. Now that I'm sick, he goes to a friend's place, says to call if I need him, then turns his phone off. Seriously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48373) - you deserved it (6361)
On 04/20/2013 at 7:40pm - love - by Thanks Babe (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML
I agree, your life sucks (49594) - you deserved it (5959)
On 04/20/2013 at 8:02am - love - by How strange - United States
Today, I learned what live maggots in chocolate cake taste like. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44407) - you deserved it (6208)
On 04/20/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by MaggotMother (woman) - United States
Today, it's my only day off work in a while. I told my boss I'd be available via phone in case of emergencies. So far I've been called three times: To ask how the fax works, to let me know it's a slow day, and to ask me where the letter R is on a keyboard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42066) - you deserved it (4800)
On 04/19/2013 at 6:17am - work - by Anonymous - Germany (Berlin)
Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42440) - you deserved it (8123)
On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)
Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47283) - you deserved it (7568)
On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40755) - you deserved it (4305)
On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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