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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She greeted us holding a baby, and I told her how cute her son was. She told me that it was her grandson. Turns out my boyfriend is the father. We're 16. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44910) - you deserved it (2929)
On 09/07/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Notyourstepmom - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was getting changed in front of my room mate of two years. Feeling comfortable, I took off all my clothes and started putting new clothes on. I asked why she wasn't taking her eyes off my naked body. She said "I'm loving the view. Didn't you know I'm a lesbian?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (16248) - you deserved it (40885)
On 09/07/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by EyesOffMe (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend's family came over and I thought it would be fun to watch old family videos of when I was a kid. A few minutes into my 5th birthday party, I excused myself and went to grab some snacks for everyone. I returned to realize I had recorded porn over my family videos. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5908) - you deserved it (46948)
On 09/06/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Ex-girlfried (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, when I was finished eating at McDonalds, I went to Shoppers to pick up a new toothbrush. I got back to my car only to find the windows smashed in. The only thing that was missing from my car was the Hello Kitty toy I got from McDonalds. Someone broke into my car for a 10 cent toy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38341) - you deserved it (2426)
On 09/06/2009 at 7:12pm - money - by effmylife (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my husband asked me for permission to have an affair with his hot secretary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61311) - you deserved it (4654)
On 09/06/2009 at 5:35pm - love - by mandinga (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I discovered that I don't have Herpes or Genital warts. I have acne on my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50924) - you deserved it (6814)
On 09/06/2009 at 2:19pm - health - by Curt (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I broke up with the girl I'd been dating for two months because she started smoking. This is a deal breaker for me. I just found out from her friend that she started smoking for the sole purpose of getting me to break it off and now plans to quit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35249) - you deserved it (5545)
On 09/06/2009 at 3:25am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Japan (Hyogo)
Today, I saw a girl I haven't seen in 4 years. She used to like me back then. Since then I have lost 50 pounds, and never had the confidence to ask her out. She said I looked really sexy so I decided to ask her out on a date then and there. She said no, she only likes fat guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40133) - you deserved it (3208)
On 09/06/2009 at 12:19am - love - by Nofatforme (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61156) - you deserved it (2103)
On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, someone asked my fiancée and I how we met. She said, "Well, it was just supposed to be a one night stand!" and laughed, right as I was about to take her hand and say, "It was love at first sight!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32437) - you deserved it (3922)
On 09/05/2009 at 2:30am - love - by prin (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, after two years of dating, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend on my birthday. It wasn't as all like I dreamed about; I dreamt that I wasn't allergic to latex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46084) - you deserved it (3806)
On 08/30/2009 at 12:16am - love - by arsewipe92 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, after two years of dating, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend on my birthday. It wasn't as all like I dreamed about; I dreamt that I wasn't allergic to latex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46084) - you deserved it (3806)
On 08/30/2009 at 12:16am - love - by arsewipe92 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14684) - you deserved it (34379)
On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7042) - you deserved it (71706)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to give the girl I am absolutely in love with advice on how to have better sex with her boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52606) - you deserved it (8123)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by shitforchris (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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