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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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hot_mess88

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hot_mess88
  • Town/Country : Honolulu, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 20 November 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 2213
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 12 posted

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hot_mess88's favorite FMLs

Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML

#8324479 (418)

I agree, your life sucks (2699) - you deserved it (38428)

On 02/16/2010 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331 (283)

I agree, your life sucks (5431) - you deserved it (22776)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

#8158295 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (22860) - you deserved it (1489)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend reached over and pinched my love handles and said "Where did this muffin top come from?". Then he sang "Do you know the muffin man?" to me. FML

#8083041 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (17244) - you deserved it (5391)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:30am - misc - by muffingirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML

#7939467 (166)

I agree, your life sucks (17517) - you deserved it (3472)

On 02/06/2010 at 3:01pm - misc - by dinosaurboy (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I walked past a group of men at the mall and one of them mooed at me. FML

#7916627 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (20064) - you deserved it (4492)

On 02/05/2010 at 9:18pm - misc - by LynnJ (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend had replaced our picture in her locket for a picture of Taylor Lautner shirtless. FML

#7724225 (281)

I agree, your life sucks (25012) - you deserved it (4154)

On 01/30/2010 at 10:20pm - love - by Twilightsux (man) - United States

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (20118) - you deserved it (2569)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

#7261053 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (25177) - you deserved it (1806)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by daragnan (man) - United States

Today, I was going to the bathroom. As I was about to wipe, I noticed that the toilet paper had butterflies printed on it. Never before had I felt bad for wiping my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks (5174) - you deserved it (16823)

On 01/07/2010 at 9:43am - misc - by Doomy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I came home from a new years party wearing a shower curtain and nothing else. FML

#7079223 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (4340) - you deserved it (25773)

On 01/01/2010 at 9:13am - misc - by NotANaturist (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I went to egg my ex-boyfriend's house, after finding out he cheated on me. I covered his house and car with eggs, toilet paper, and silly string. When I went to get back in my car, my keys were locked inside, the alarm went off, and my ex walked outside, with his new girlfriend. FML

#7040883 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (7025) - you deserved it (33371)

On 12/30/2009 at 7:03pm - love - by BrutallyBlonde (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I are driving down to France and it's going to take 4 hours. If that wasn't bad enough, my mum decides that she is going to listen to the CD my sister bought her for Christmas on repeat for the whole journey. It's Lady Gaga. FML

#6953630 (321)

I agree, your life sucks (26229) - you deserved it (6407)

On 12/26/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by OhGodKillMeNow (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML

#6553131 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (35968) - you deserved it (5754)

On 12/01/2009 at 4:11pm - misc - by xXxJoe16xXx - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks (27963) - you deserved it (1930)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)