hkspringers

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hkspringers

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 107
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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hkspringers's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

by Sarah / 08/30/2012 at 8:58am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I received a call from my future sister in-law, telling me that she and her future husband had decided to hold their wedding ceremony on my birthday. I was told not to celebrate my birthday, as it would "take away the attention to the true meaning of the day." FML

by SuzyTurquoiseBlu / 08/29/2012 at 1:32am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I learned that several thousand people in my state got tickets this month for driving and talking on the phone. My mom called to tell me this while I was driving. I'm now part of that statistic. Thanks, mom. FML

by ticketed / 08/28/2012 at 12:04pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, there's a cricket in my apartment. I don't know if I'm more annoyed by the fact that it somehow got up three flights of stairs to get here, or that my cat is so excited about it that he's jumping on me and howling in my face to announce the cricket's presence instead of killing it. FML

by calivianya / 08/28/2012 at 12:49am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I started my new job at a fragrance store. While training, the manager had me smell all of the scents to become familiar with the products. Before my shift was over, I'd had three asthma attacks. FML

by Joe / 08/27/2012 at 9:33am / United States (Oklahoma) / Work

Today, my dog head-butted me in the mouth so hard that my lip split open. Twenty minutes later, I unthinkingly sprayed perfume directly into the wound. FML

by g'day cunt / 08/26/2012 at 2:27pm / Australia (South Australia) / Animals

Today, I took my puppy for a walk around town. I had to stop and explain to several people that yes, his head was purple because my little sister wanted to make him look like a Na'vi from Avatar. FML

by AmyLeigh / 08/26/2012 at 12:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML

by alix / 08/24/2012 at 11:45am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Animals

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 10:00pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad introduced me to my half-sister. He'd only recently found out that he had another daughter by another woman, and had only just met her. She and I have been in the same class in school for the past three years. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 5:40pm / Ireland (Mayo) / Kids

Today, while working at the pet store, I had to feed the snakes. I'd thawed too many mice, so instead of wasting one, I fed it to our turtles. They decided to play tug of war with it, ripping it in half in front of several terrified children. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 12:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 12:14pm / United States (West Virginia) / Transportation

Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML

by tal / 08/22/2012 at 5:57am / France / Animals

Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML

by Anonymous / 08/22/2012 at 2:01am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML

by cclllc / 08/14/2012 at 5:06am / United States (Texas) / Love