Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hiitisbrooke

Search for a member

hiitisbrooke

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 February 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1046
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About hiitisbrooke : I'm Ali. Just messing with my iPhone. :)

hiitisbrooke's page activity

Visits<b>stephaniewlntwsk</b> - yesterday at 3:45pm<b>AE101</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 3:04pm<b>Pyro1921</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 9:47pm<b>boomHEADSHOTllll</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 12:30pm<b>sky413</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:40pm<b>marleybree</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 4:51am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 4:54pm<b>kavemann</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:16am<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:33am<b>rjt93</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 4:53am<b>obeykiddsmalls</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 11:03am<b>joeyl2008</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:56am<b>cnewton84</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:00pm<b>Betterthanu123</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 3:07pm<b>mangobutt7</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 11:09pm<b>sethmayer9</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 12:29pm<b>Syruphs</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 4:17am

hiitisbrooke's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of hiitisbrooke's badges

hiitisbrooke's favorite FMLs

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

#20832005
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42938) - you deserved it (4118)

On 08/11/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by ew - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60439) - you deserved it (9128)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML

#20626789
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44361) - you deserved it (3045)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by lonesome - Canada

Today, six weeks before my wedding, my mother decided to claim that she never agreed on paying for it and that she doesn't think she will. Now I have six weeks to scavenge enough cash for the wedding she planned in the first place. FML

#20626669
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48622) - you deserved it (3927)

On 04/28/2013 at 12:29am - money - by need_cash_now (man) - United States

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

#20471562
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28899) - you deserved it (3360)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend in the bathroom, we heard a knock at the door, then her father's voice. I had to fake constipation noises until he left. FML

#20053940
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22093) - you deserved it (12133)

On 09/02/2012 at 11:38am - intimacy - by scot - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was icing an injured foot with a frozen water bottle as the doctor directed me. When I was done, I picked the bottle up and immediately dropped it on the same injured foot, which is now swollen and bruised. FML

#20053572
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16957) - you deserved it (4007)

On 09/02/2012 at 2:27am - health - by CC - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had my blood drawn for a lab test. I was then given a container so I could give a urine sample. In the middle of peeing, I got woozy, started blacking out, and hit my head against the wall. A nurse discovered me with my pants down. FML

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

#19455929
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14480) - you deserved it (34375)

On 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML

Today, I had to Google how to find the area of a circle. I'm working on my PhD in engineering. FML

#18928299
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9531) - you deserved it (31770)

On 01/27/2012 at 8:20pm - misc - by pirsquared (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML

#18872855
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9805) - you deserved it (25144)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:44pm - love - by actor my ass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were hugging in the hall after school. This annoying kid I know walked by, and yelled, "Tiny penis!" at me. My girlfriend responded, "Yep." FML

#18872810
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36219) - you deserved it (4413)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML

#18766108
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42912) - you deserved it (4397)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - India

Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "how did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?". She yelled from the other room, "you know that little plate with the red stripe". I was eating off of it. FML

#327078
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81286) - you deserved it (6909)

On 03/14/2009 at 7:06pm - health - by imfullthanks (man) - Norway (Oslo)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: