About hiitisbrooke : hola yo yo i'm brooke. user since 2008
hiitisbrooke's FML badges
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
hiitisbrooke's favorite FMLs
Today, my company told me that they refuse to buy me new safety footwear without a doctor's note, because my shoe size is three sizes smaller than the minimum size my company provides. I actually have to get my doctor to prove my shoe size. FML
by tinyfeet / 03/01/2016 at 10:15pm / New Zealand / Work
by 221bcompanion / 01/18/2016 at 12:18am / United States (Ohio) / Health
Today, I've been staying with my parents while I have time off from school. They got drunk and started an entire family fight because my dad made pizza and my mom is lactose intolerant. She insists my dad did it on purpose because "he's an asshole and knows I can't eat cheese." FML
by just outdone / 12/30/2015 at 11:45pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
by hiitisbrooke / 11/23/2015 at 3:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, I was on the bus home from work when I felt something strange in my hair. I turned to look, and saw the old woman next to me sucking on the end of my hair. When she noticed me staring, she didn't stop but instead said, "So pretty. Can I have?" FML
by Koizumiii / 11/15/2015 at 1:47pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation
by EnderHorse / 11/05/2015 at 3:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Health
by Jared / 10/23/2015 at 2:08pm / United States / Transportation
by Muina / 10/23/2015 at 7:08am / Morocco (Meknes-Tafilalet) / Money
by MeaganElizabethM / 10/11/2015 at 8:31am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/09/2015 at 12:58pm / United States (Maine) / Work
Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML
by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was talking to a colleague about love. He told me he's given up on love because things ended badly with a previous girl. I said, "Maybe it wasn't meant to be, and she wasn't the one." He then said the reason it didn't work out was because she killed herself. FML
by Anonymous / 08/20/2015 at 8:37am / Portugal (Lisboa) / Miscellaneous
Today, after working incredibly hard to get into college without having to take out loans, classes started. I was told we'll need a $200 piece of software, and we'll fail without it. There's no way I can afford it. FML
by NotCollegeBound / 08/20/2015 at 3:21am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML
by Catsfordays / 08/20/2015 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Love
by ew / 08/11/2013 at 9:09am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 2Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…