[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

high4

Search for a member

high4
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 418
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

high4's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

high4's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML

#3521294 (501)

I agree, your life sucks (44946) - you deserved it (23915)

On 07/06/2009 at 1:55am - misc - by expen_dable (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was camping. Me and this really cute girl were hitting it off real nice. It was the last night so we both headed over to my tent to have sex. I was just about to get it in when a raccoon ripped my tent causing the girl to scream and runaway. I got cockblocked by a raccoon. FML

#2729024 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (59383) - you deserved it (6145)

On 06/08/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by Baggabbles123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710 (1201)

I agree, your life sucks (55727) - you deserved it (136009)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

#2526721 (259)

I agree, your life sucks (55464) - you deserved it (4212)

On 06/02/2009 at 7:08am - kids - by fallsdownplenty45 (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, I pulled up to the stoplight near my house. It was dark with no traffic and the car behind me kept edging closer and closer to me. I finally got fed up with waiting and the car and ran it. In fact, it was a cop and he was trying to read my license plate because the back light was out. FML

#2490084 (91)

I agree, your life sucks (6937) - you deserved it (35224)

On 06/01/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by PulledOver (woman) - United States

Today, I thought I would make my first trip to the beach. While in the water, I was stung by a jellyfish. My friend had to pee on me. I went back into the water to wash the pee off and got stung by another jellyfish. FML

#2464831 (216)

I agree, your life sucks (51477) - you deserved it (6803)

On 05/31/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Heather (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had a pretty big erection while getting checked out at the airport. The security guard was scanning my potentially "dangerous" erection for at least one long minute in front of my wife, kids, and 20 people behind me. FML

#2464637 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (39714) - you deserved it (8549)

On 05/31/2009 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a dentist appointment. While waiting, I pulled out my Cosmo magazine to entertain myself. The woman sitting across from me points and tells me I'm reading "Satan's Manual." I told her I don't believe in Satan. She said, "You'll know he's real when you become his bitch!" FML

#2442070 (169)

I agree, your life sucks (42437) - you deserved it (5397)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:22pm - misc - by satanlovesme (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I finally broke my two year dry spell, but as she was putting on the condom, I came. She laughed from the time she was putting on her clothes to when she walked out the door. I don't think she's going to call back. FML

#2792 (72)

I agree, your life sucks (31115) - you deserved it (5844)

On 01/27/2009 at 7:47am - intimacy - by theguy24 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

#2729 (76)

I agree, your life sucks (34604) - you deserved it (1341)

On 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm - health - by Noname - Japan (Fukuoka)