heygirlheyyyyy

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heygirlheyyyyy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 34340
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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heygirlheyyyyy's page activity

Visits<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:13am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 9:18pm<b>pharaohasphuck</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 7:29pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:01am<b>melons</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 8:03pm<b>mikeding</b> - the 04/25/2013 at 11:23pm<b>motion_legacy</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 4:55pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:49am<b>ariddleintongues</b> - the 08/31/2009 at 11:32pm<b>Mr_Tuff_Guy</b> - the 07/26/2009 at 7:06pm<b>Jehanne</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 5:41am<b>tjd13</b> - the 06/28/2009 at 7:36pm<b>vdrummer7</b> - the 06/28/2009 at 6:51pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 06/24/2009 at 2:46pm<b>earl_125</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 12:44am<b>AlexZB</b> - the 06/14/2009 at 10:52pm<b>814CKxK1D</b> - the 06/14/2009 at 7:22pm<b>surfbumm</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 2:22am

heygirlheyyyyy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

heygirlheyyyyy's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

by grannysmack / 07/11/2009 at 5:10am / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, my mum called and told me she had bought me a new, white dish washer for my apartment because it doesn't have one. I was SO excited and told her I'd pay her back as soon as I could. I only had to pay her $1.25. She bought me a sponge. FML

by thanksalot / 07/10/2009 at 9:09pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Money

Today, I finally had sex with a girl I've been dating for over a month. Before we got started she told me not to worry about the birth control because she could handle that. So after we finished I asked her what kind of birth control she used. She said she meditated. FML

by UrbanCass / 06/25/2009 at 7:44pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I had a big craving for a popsicle so I went to a convenience store and bought one. On my first bite, my upper lip got stuck to it. I ripped it off and spent the next 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding from the giant cut I'd put in my lip. It hurt too much to finish the popsicle. FML

by mk / 06/20/2009 at 1:47am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I called the florist and ordered a flower arrangement for my grandma, who I was told was sick. I said I didn't know what to get her, so just to send her something nice. I got a call from my mom calling me an inconsiderate bastard. They sent my grandma forget-me-nots. She has Alzheimers. FML

by Originality18 / 02/23/2009 at 9:22pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell down the stairs twice. I fell from the top, stopped in the middle, stood up, stepped down one more step, tripped, and fell down the rest of the stairs. FML

by Lars / 01/31/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

by mehdi / 10/13/2008 at 4:20am / Miscellaneous